The Cure - His Dark Materials

CHAPTER TWO

"She was created by God from one of Adam's ribs to be his companion. Eve was life, mother of all living."

|LYRA'S WORLD

It was another one of those restless nights.

She could drink all the tea they offered, take a nerve remedy, or even go into hypnosis if that was the case. But nothing would make sleep come, not even a simple nap. When that suffering came, nothing could be done. So, not finding a solution, Lyra could only occupy herself in the early hours of lost sleep.

She could invent a reason for this sudden anxiety, something others would accept without question or opinion. But here alone in her room, she didn't have to lie, not to herself. She knew why, the only possible reason.

Lyra gets out of bed and walks around the small room. It had been fifteen years since her conversation with the Dean of College Jordan and Mrs. Ralf, fifteen years ago she accepted the invitation to go to Sta. Sophia, years in which Lyra completed her basic studies easily, with the help of Mrs. Ralf, and many other professors. 

She certainly made friends with the college girls, but over time they drifted apart, following their lives, their own paths. Lyra, on the other hand, squeezed into college, dedicating herself to the alethiometer, making it the study of her life, being accepted with good grace by the professors.

After washing her face, she returns to her room, looking around trying to decide what to do to try to keep that strong, painful feeling in her chest at bay. But it seemed so much stronger today... 

Sighing, she walks over to the desk and sits down, turns on the table light, and picks up any book to distract herself, or at least try to. But her mind can't focus on the words on the pages.

Where was Pan? Normally he would be back by then, and Lyra had asked him not to be long when he wanted to leave, in case someone came by, and also, so as not to risk being seen alone.

And alas, he was the only one who could calm her down, the only one she could talk to about what she felt.

So many worlds, so many lives, so many people, so many memories... and yet a single word dominates her mind... a single name...

Will.

The word "longing" is not enough to define what she felt. Nothing in human vocabulary, or Gallisvepian or that of the Mulefa or any other world would be capable of understanding the size of that pain, of that feeling that gnaws at her insides.

And even then, she has to move on, has to keep living. For there is no more Subtle Knife, there are no more windows, there are no more opportunities.

There is no longer Lyra and Will together.

The only thing that still existed was her love for him.

Will Parry.

She feels her heartbeat, so fast, and takes a deep breath as she twists her hair into a loose bun. The memories swirl in the woman's mind, a euphoria building within her chest.

Why this now?

Lyra was used to these attacks, but she always controlled them with ease. She had learned to do this the hard way in the first few months after leaving Will in his world. She had to, because the other option was to let the longing crush her soul completely.

But today something was different. It had been a while since that feeling dominated her so strongly.

She tried to concentrate on the book in front of her; it was about the multiple meanings that the symbols an alethiometer could have.