Together Forever - (Station 19 fanfic)

EPISODE

TW : Panic attack, POTS

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Carina's POV :

The next day, I strangely woke up before Maya. That was something that never happened. I quietly sneaked out of our bedroom and went to make myself some coffee, but when I walked by Bianca's bedroom, I noticed light coming of it. I firstly thought she must have forgot to turn it off yesterday as she was so tired after the shopping, but when I entered her room, she was sat by the window, looking outside, clearly lost in her thoughts.

I cleared my throat softly, not wanting so startle her. But she jumped a little before turning towards me.

"Hi bambina."

"Hey."

"What are you doing up ? It's so early." I questioned.

"I could ask you the same thing." She sweetly smirked, but as I was waiting for an honest response, she sighed. "I- I could sleep."

I made my way closer to her and sat on the edge of her bed. She moved to sit next to me and rested her head on my shoulder.

"Bianca, I want you to feel like you can tell me anything, okay ?"

She only hummed in response.

"Did you sleep at all ?"

She sighed again. I knew it meant that she was up all night long.

"Did you have sleep problems before ?"

"Before what ?" She asked in confusion, her head still on my shoulder.

"Before the accident bellina."

"I- I... no. I never had trouble sleeping." She confessed. "But since it happened, the storm and... and everything, I- I either feel like I can sleep forever, like last time when we brunched, I was so rested, I could have stayed in bed for five more hours. But some other nights I can't even manage to close my eyes. I have so many things going around in my brain and- and it won't stop ! And when I- I'm tired it's worst. The thoughts are worse, it's like they're running in my head, racing again and again and again and-"

I stopped the teenager by taking her face in my hands. She was getting all worked up, probably from the sleep deprivation. I squeezed her cheeks between my hands and forced her to look at me as she was nearly hyperventilating.

"Breathe bella. Breathe for me, breathe for Carina. I know how hard it must be, trust me I know. I understand the feeling when you can't sleep, and you're even too tired to try. But for now I want you to stop worrying about that, okay ? For now I need you to breathe and calm yourself down." She was breathing very heavily and I was getting worried. "Look at me, no eyes forward bambina. I need you to breathe, In and out. Follow my breathing Bianca."

It looked like she was choking on the air. She was getting paler by the seconds and her eyes started to flutter.

"Bianca, I'm worried your gonna faint. Let me help you lay down." I said aloud, even if it was more as a statement for me. I was able to lay her down on her bed as she getting weaker, her head resting on the fluffy pillow. I wanted to check her blood pressure, her oxygen level and so many other medical things but she needed me close to her right now. So I only took her wrist in my hand and I tried to find her pulse.

"You're heart is racing baby girl." As I said those words, Bianca's eyes closed.

I sighed, knowing I couldn't do much to make her better at this point. I put the covers on her unconscious body because for some people with POTS, the body temperature changes when they pass out. Then I started stroking her pale and cold face, sometimes applying pressure on her nose to remind her brain to breathe. After what seemed like hours, Bianca started coming back.

"Ciao bella." I smiled sadly.