you only live twice - bsd x reader

wan! chapter one

much similar to official wan chapters, wan is also not cannon to the timeline of this fic , wan chapters can be read as being in the same universe as other wan chapters but you shouldn't view them as a part of the main fic's story
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chaos. absolute chaos was the only possible way to describe the situation you're in. who knew a simple car ride back from a mission could be so hellish? but what else would you expect from the armed detective agency. nothing they ever did was exactly handled normally. they always were a bunch of odd ones.

you glanced out the car's window. you're lucky in that manner, you guess, at least you didn't get shoved into the middle seat in the back like atsushi did, squished between kenji and ranpo.

yosano sat in the passenger seat. left in charge of both the gps and the music. granted, she wasn't the worst choice for handling the aux. god forbid you had to listen to dazai's playlist for three hours. but with how loud she'd turned the music up, it was a pain anyways. it was only semi drowning out the sound of ranpo's handheld that played some game with a ridiculously annoying soundtrack.

you wondered how kunikida did it. how he managed to drive so carefully despite all the overwhelming sounds around him. perhaps he's simply grown used to the constant distractions of the members of the agency. or maybe he's just gotten that good at tuning everyone else out. either way with how he was driving the car probably seemed normal enough to anyone else on the highway, but it certainly didn't feel like that from the inside. granted, the man was still shouting back every once in a while, but he was doing it noticeably less than usual.

kenji and atsushi were probably the most peaceful one's here. kenji seemed content enough, staring at the window and pointing out something interesting every once in a while. and atsushi seemed just as rattled by the overwhelming chaos as you were.

and of course there was dazai, sitting directly across from you. who was, arguably, the most bothersome person in this car. maybe it was the boredom getting to him, or maybe he's just always this annoying. but he genuinely would not shut up. especially to you, since you have the misfortune of being placed right beside him.

"hey..." dazai leans over in your direction once again, a telling smile on his face.

"i swear to god if you ask me to try and grab kunikida and make him crash this car ONE MORE TIME. i will strangle you to death. right here, right now." you didn't even look his way.

"really? you promise?" and dazai's eyes glimmered like you'd just proposed to him.

with that you snapped your head to the row of seats beside you. as expected, ranpo was eating from a bag of chips while he played his game. without a word you grabbed the bag and twisted the opening closed.

"hey! those are mine!" ranpo's cries fell on deaf ears.

with your new makeshift weapon in hand you raised your arm up. before promptly slamming the bag against dazai's head. several times. once you were through with attacking the man you tossed the bag of chips back into ranpo's lap.

"what the- these are crushed now! you owe me a new bag!"

"you're acting like you're not just going to eat it anyways." you rolled your eyes, too busy glaring at dazai to turn and humor ranpo as well.

with a little bit of annoyed grumbling ranpo did exactly what you expected and continued eating the chips despite your effects on the bag's contents.

"you're so cruel to me!" dazai cried out. "i didn't even ask the question, and yet you tried to bash my skull in!"

"you're lucky i didn't grab ranpo's switch and use that instead."

dazai faked a gasp. "no. you wouldn't."

you flipped around, going to snatch the nintendo switch from ranpo's hand. only for him to hold a vice grip on the device.

"hands off! i'm not letting you break my console just because dazai can't shut up."

you didn't respond, only continuing to struggle to grab it, leaning further away from your seat.

"can you guys not sit still for twenty minutes?! we're almost there, god damnit!" kunikida's voice split through the commotion and you quickly found yourself sitting up right in your seat again.

it seems during your tussle with ranpo, dazai had tried looking for someone else to bother. maybe it's because she was directly in front of him, but dazai tried leaning over to yosano, who only blasted the music even louder to drown out his words.

kunikida said it'd be twenty more minutes, huh? at this rate you doubt you'd last that long.