AkiAngel - if you Never Touched Me

using bodies, up as we go

"Will you stay with me?"

Her words made Aki stop going. His shaky breaths are shortened. Before he could say anything else, Himeno has placed her lips on his, cigarettes tumbling down the bed. He can taste her. He can feel her fingers, finding his sensitive spots. But his noises are cold and terribly forced, he doesn't feel her.

He never loved her.

Aki retaliates, face down and his neck cranked as he finds a way out of his dizziness to escape. His hands reached out, stretched. But she has her body ontop of his, she has her mouth linked to his. Her hands intertwine his, her body colliding with his. Aki had never felt this uneasy,though they had been in this situation multiple times, now that they're going all the way, it feels absolutely

Wrong.

Himeno blows a smoke to his face, it's shades blurring his vision. Aki struggles to form any words, he is too sober and weak to do anything. Like before, he takes whatever she gives. But as his eyes face the empty ceiling, there was one thing on his mind.

And it's not Makima-san anymore.

Before he could hold her by the shoulders, Himeno is already pinning him down. His world turns black, drowned out all the images flowing in his brain. Her lips touch his exposed chest, in which he flinches.

"Tell me," she whispers.

"Tell me you'll stay with me."

If she said this to him a year ago he would've agreed and they'd be on the way to another country, escaping this town.

Aki squeezes his eyes shut, unable to process all that's happening. He hates this part of his job. He hates being an adult. He hates having to take care of everyone he loves, though he feels he needs to. As the intoxication of beer sits down his throat, Aki begins to understand it all.

This life is temporary. He'll go too, at any time. It's his job to put himself as a shield. For anyone he loves. They are all he has.

Himeno drags her hand down his chest to his tummy. And begins to line the shape of his stomach, his vulnerable spot.

They are all I have.

Aki forces his eyes open. And he sits right up, forcing his vomit back down his throat. Everything feels weird, and the numbness of his body makes it difficult for him to speak. But he says it anyways, hoping the message gets across.

"Himeno-san." Himeno leans back for abit, it shows she's listening.

"I don't like you, that way."

She doesn't take it well. In fact, that made her snap out of her imagination, her hands are no longer tense and willing. She sits back down, away from him. Aki, finally able to break away, creates distance between them. He's relieved, it's like a heavy weight is off his shoulders. A part of him has returned.

"Fine, then don't tell me." She tilts her head, overly zealous eyes darting him.

"I'll make you forget about that manipulative bitch." Her words made him gulp in fear. He didn't intend for such a messy situation. It wasn't even Makima he was going for anymore. Aki shakes his head, looking back at her.

"It's not because I...like anybody else."

Himeno then gasps, covering her mouth.

"You're not like, gay, or anything like that, right?" She goes on and on,rambling about how she doesn't mean to meddle with his sexual identity, and that it's okay to be 'different'. Aki sighs, putting his shirt back on. Meanwhile, the ashamed Himeno shudders away the thought of having sex with him at all. The alcohol has subsided.