AkiAngel - if you Never Touched Me

waking up to fantasy

Angel has his head on the counter. On contrast to his short and small body, he still had alot of fire in him to be stubborn. As his dazed eyes burn a darker gold, he raises his left hand with all his remaining strength.

"Another margarita, please."

Aki watches in silence as his body is flopped to aside, as his alcohol tolerance is low. They've only had four drinks. It's barely 12am.

This was very, very far from what Aki expected- Angel and him sharing conversations and talking about life and that leads to them falling asleep next to each other.

Well, turns out they've skipped the first few steps and Angel almost knocked off after his second glass. The liquor was biting and strong, it hit the back of Aki's throat as he swallowed it whole. He wanted to appear 'cool', unfortunately unable to as it had been a long day for him as well. The two hadn't said a word since they hugged.

Aki thought he was still mad at him for not wearing his gloves when they embraced and kept a grudge. But in reality Angel wasn't thinking of anything.

He just replayed that moment in his head, unable to comprehend the fact that his first hug was with a human.

A boy he loved.

His head is on the cold marble counter, face buried in his arm, and Aki tipping the waiter. He waits a little longer, and forces the last sip linger down his throat.

"Are you still angry at me?" Angel was too drowned out by his thoughts he didn't hear him the first time. His dazed, dilated pupils struggle to find him.

"Angel." Aki calls. And their eyes meet.

"Hmm." Angel grumbles, his eyes about to close now, and his body limp. He slides over to his right, and refuses to open his eyes again.

"Let's go home." Aki tugs on his sleeve.

"No, a few..f..more.." Angel's voice is accidentally loud, it made the couple beside them stare. His hands reach out to the counter, clawing at nothing, his redden face almost like a strawberry. Instantly, Aki's hand falls to his waist, and hold him back.

Aki shakes his head, then taps on his shoulder again.

"You can't take anymore, it's bad for your health." Aki warns, concern in his low tone. Unexpectedly, the devil begins to break into a small giggle. It wasn't just a giggle. It sounded like pure happiness. The first time Angel didn't sound terribly mundane and...depressed.

Aki raises an eyebrow. Even he's confused.

"You're so cute...when you care...." His slurred words are somehow clear in Aki's ears. He opens his mouth to speak, but Angel, yet again, intercepts.

"I don't think...you understand Aki. I cannot save you."

It's not the words that registered, it was how it sank his heart and touched his soul in the most excruciating way he could ever imagine. It felt like needles scratching his skin, it made his head dizzy.

I cannot save you.

He knows it, too. Nothing can change his death, it's written and he knows it's near.

Right now his hand is inches away from his, his pinky in mid-air, like he's craving to feel him touch. Aki bites his lip, his heart beginning to ache.

"I know, and it's okay." The softness of his lips, through the mess of his hair, still like the color of a pretty summer sky. Inside, Aki knows there will never be a universe where they'd be together. Not again, not ever.

But right now, as he leans forward, and forgets about the world around them, all he thinks about is how much he begs to be kissed. And to be remembered, and loved, for once.