Ultimately | Skephalo

let's chat.

Hey, long time no see, right?
I have something to get off my chest, because it doesn't feel right keeping inside.

I never stopped liking Skeppy, when I first saw the whole thing with the slur, I used it as a free pass to discontinue this story.

I never wanted to continue, it became a chore to write, still feels like it is. But that doesn't matter anymore, because I'm okay. You're okay.

As for my confession.

I'm ashamed of this fic, I truly am.
Looking back I wish I had done a creative storyline, and I feel as though I could have fixed it if I hadn't given up on writing it.

I never stopped writing; certainly not for MCYT, I've just branched off to a different side of it.

I would like to continue this fanfic, as it feels wrong to let something that holds so much memories go.

I remember the first time I came up with the plot for this story, I loved it, I was so hyper fixated on it I wrote chapters everyday, because I loved it.

I never knew how to write the way that I wanted to, so I faked it till I could make it.

Which, leads me to another point.
Through the time I've been gone, I've been (like I said), writing.

But not writing in a way that makes sense, I write using metaphors and symbolism that makes people think about what they're reading.

I guess that's what kept me from this story as long as it has.

So, signing back into this account only to see 200+ notifications on this story as well as high ranks, I asked myself,

"Do I deserve this?"

And I don't. Because it's not something that seems to be good, it's something I wrote just to write. I wrote for myself, not others.

Maybe that's why I was so motivated to continue it.

I always told myself not to discontinue a story, because that's not fair. Not fair for myself, not fair for the readers.

The love this shitty little book has gained is so out of this world in my mind. Because it's bad, it's not thought out, it's not written in a way that makes sense, and it's not me.

I guess, the reason I'm coming back to this story isn't for pity, but to apologize.
Apologize for everything I couldn't do.
Apologize for everything I didn't know.

I can't promise I will return to making chapters of this fanfic, but I refuse to leave it how it is.

Some things will always remain the same, and this isn't one of those.

So thank you to the people still reading this,
thank you to the people who think this is good,
thank you to the people who have been here since the start,
and thank you for giving me the chance to grow as a writer.

Signing off, for now or forever,
       Blueberry.