Throw Your Colors at the Dark {Vic Fuentes}

6 - Miserable at Best

    I had expected to awaken from the dream I had dreamt last night, the one where I was tangled in the caramel arms of the one I truly loved and fell asleep peacefully next to.  I had anticipated my eyes hitting the bland with ceiling without being able to recall the pleasant reverie after which I would rise from my bed where my fiancé was no longer laying and walk to the kitchen like I normally would on an average day like this.  I had predicted that I would go back to my ordinary life, images of the man I wanted more than my own life dissipating as though made of nothing more than dust in the wind.  I had estimated that I would be miserable, grow old and wretched without him by my side after marrying the black haired, blue eyed gentleman that held care for me but little love.

    However I had not seen this one coming.

    My body was laced in the warmth of another core that heated someone else’s flesh and fed them vitality.  This was odd for Jeremy rarely, if ever, cuddled with me so gently.  We would snuggle after a passionate sexual encounter but for no more than an hour and he would turn over, finding his own comfort before he fell into sleep.  This was a pleasant surprise but as I opened my eyes, I did not find the walls of my bedroom nor the ceiling of white I had anticipated.

    Rather there was a black ceiling and white walls, guitar amps and drum sets stacked along the edges of the room while posters and images of long since past bands painted the siding.  At first I was frightened as I didn’t understand where the hell I was or what this place could be but as I glanced down to the arm encircling my waist, my belly filled with dread.   

    The caramel painted skin was real.

    I turned about, hoping that this was some farce and I would find that I was hallucinating.  Jeremy was hugging me, not the boy I wanted.  Could it be Victor?  No, I was dreaming, I had to be.  There was no way in hell that we had found one another and that I had forgiven him for his faults.  I couldn’t have forgiven him for leaving me like he did, not so quickly.

    But as I turned around, I heard the faint yet familiar sleep snores of none other than the boy I remembered and longed for.  His hair was fanned out around his head, eyes shut while dark lashes kissed at his cheekbones.  His mouth was open in an unattractive fashion as a line of drool soaked into the pillow his other arm cradled.  He held me close, protectively, the dark caramel a stark contrast to my pale white abdomen.  It took me a moment to realize I was naked beneath the blanket that had gathered at my hips and gave me little to no cover.  The boy named Victor Fuentes was tangled against me, our legs wrapped around one another’s in an embrace that seemed far more intimate than I could handle at the moment.  The worst part was that I was having a hard time remembering how I got here.

    And for a moment I was happy that I was just with him…though it lasted less than a minute.  It was when I felt the finger with the promise encircling it that I began to shudder and weep.

    This woke the creature sleeping next to me.

    He smiled, his eyes peeling open to reveal those deep brown orbs while he took in a deep breath, stretching and making unnecessary but absolutely adorable groaning noises.  I couldn’t help but turn away while he sat up, hiding my tears so that I could enjoy him for one last second before reality hit and I had to tell him that I was leaving as soon as I dressed.  I didn’t want to go, but I had to.  I had lingered too long on a deadened past.

    “Good morning,” he murmured, kissing my bared shoulder so tenderly that gooseflesh erupted from the spot he touched.  I had to leave and if I broke it to him like ripping off a Band-Aid, maybe he would be too shocked to say anything and I could leave in peace.

    “I have to go,” I muttered pathetically before turning to him.  His brow wrinkled.

    “No,” he replied, “I was going to get us some breakfast.  Last night was our final performance day for a month and I thought we could go somewhere get something to eat and catch up you know?”  I shook my head.