Our Bodyguard|18+

Thirty

Tears well up in my eyes after watching another sonogram of my baby. I grip it so tightly against my chest, with one hand rubbing my stomach smoothly as if I'm patting a tiny head. I wish I could show the whole world that I'm gonna be a mom. I feel like shouting at the top of my lungs that there's a life growing inside me, but by no means can I do that in such circumstances.

So I suck my happiness and just cry. I let the tears scream my joy as I cling to my doctor's words that everything is fine, that my baby is a fighter, and that I don't need to worry about anything because he or she is hanging on so tightly. And that's what matters to me right now. It's what gives me the strength to get up and fight so that we can finally be free.

And I swear to God we will be free. It's something I owe my baby at the very least.

"You still haven't told Patrick?" Morgan sits behind her desk, still wearing her blue scrubs with her hair tied up into a tight bun.

"No." I sniff my tears, pulling myself together despite the plethora of emotions swirling inside me. "We're getting a divorce and I don't want the baby to stand in our way as an excuse."

"Divorce?" She's shocked, even though many people know by now which is why I made my visit here very discrete without any paperwork to keep a record of my clinical attendance.

"We've just reached an impasse," I reply, staring at the little pic of my little bean once again. "Sometimes you just know when it's over, and it's futile trying to pretend like you don't." I lift my gaze at her with an undescribed smile.

Morgan reclines back heavily, a small frown of pity flinted on her aging, round face. "I'm so sorry, Mia. I guess you're right. Don't I know all too well about that? I've been divorced once, as you already know."

I know. That's why I believed she'd understand and continue keeping my secret until this is all over. And to be cautious, this will be my last visit here.

"I have to go. I still have some work to do and... Well, it's the first day of my divorce trial tomorrow so I'm trying to keep together if you know what I mean." I force a smile as I rise, clutching my bag and the ultrasound photo of my little bean.

Paris if it's a girl, and Rayden Junior if it's a boy. I'll love my baby in any form, she or he.

"Take it easy, Mia. I'm sure everything will be fine." Morgan stands up to regard my leave, and what she has said is all I'm hoping for.

___

I've been ignoring Red's calls since last night, and I won't speak to him unless it's face-to-face. Maybe it's the hormones, or just me being a bitch, because I feel like making him suffer for what he did with Kenna last night. I'm not gonna be a fool again whose man gets stolen every time by the so-called friends.

Never will I let him do that to me again. I don't care what his reasons were to have chosen to play along with Kenna's scheme, but the fact that they were together at that moment still perturbs me to my very deep core. I barely slept last night, too many dark scenarios played in my mind and all I saw was a betrayal.

Anne and Patrick in the study were replaced by Kenna and Red in a hotel room. I woke up shaking, sweating, and crying in the middle of the night. I hate being this vulnerable. I detest the feeling that anytime he may hurt me the same way my husband did and I know it'll hurt me more painfully than it does now.

And when I'm about to start my car, I get a call from Luca. I hesitate for a while because he hardly calls me unless it's a state of utter emergency. The first thing that comes to mind is maybe Red is in danger, and if not, maybe something happened regarding our little counterintelligence force.