It's Complicated

Chapter 4

I woke up and I felt something around me waist. I turned over to see it was Chase. Memories from last night came flooding back to me. I smiled knowing that he stayed but then I remembered I had to talk to the bimbo today. Great.

Chase looked so peaceful in his sleep. So much younger. Like nothing in the world could ever bother him. While I was watching him his eyes fluttered open to the most beautiful color of blue. So clear, like ice.

"Morning," he said in this cute morning voice.

"Morning." 

I sat up and stretched out my tired muscles. Chase sat up and did the same. 

"So what is on the agenda?" he asked.

"Well breakfast and then I have to have a very awkward talk with your mother."

"Sounds...."

"Ya."

"Let's go."

I search through my closet and grab one one my many pairs of sweatpants and a t-shirt. Then I usher Chase out the room so I can change.

After I get dressed I take Chase's hand and we head to breakfast. For breakfast today....waffles. I fucking love waffles. They are the only thing I actually enjoy in this hellhole.

I was quiet at breakfast. I still didn't want others to know I spoke. I refuse to be anyone's experiment. Or anyone's success. No one made me talk but Chase. Dr. Williams had nothing to do with it. Now I have to meet her and talk about it. After 9 years of trying to forget I have to remember.  

After we were done eating I grabbed Chase's hand and we slowly made out way to her office. 

Chase looked down at me and said, "You know you don't have to tell her...or me if you don't want to."

"But I want to. I have kept this in so long. You have a right to know."

"Okay, if you're sure."

We got to the door of her office but I hesitated. Did I really want to tell her?

I finally built up enough courage to knock on the door. 

She answered immediately the door.

"Yes, Come in. Just have a seat in your usual spot."

I sat down on the couch and Chase sat right next to me not letting go of my hand.

Dr. McBitcherson's gaze dropped down to glare at our intertwined hands but said nothing about it.

"So whenever you're ready, tell us what happened."

I stayed silent for a few seconds and then finally started to tell them what happened that day.

“It all started when I was about six years old. My sister and I were playing in our front lawn. She wanted to play hide and seek and of course I agreed.

“I wanna pay hide ‘nd seek sissy,” she said.

“She was only three so how could I refuse. I closed my eyes and started counting. 1, 2, 3, 4- I was cut off by a loud bang followed immediately by another…then the screeching of burning rubber. I opened my eyes to see my sister laying behind a tree with blood pouring out of her wounds. One to the stomach, one to the chest. I ran to her and I pulled her in my lap. The last words she said to me were, ‘You found me sissy.’ She closed her eyes. I kept screaming for her to wake up but she never did. My parents came running outside. I could hear sirens in the distance. The police were too late, she was already dead. They caught the guy a few days later. When they asked him why he did it he said her dad owed him some money. He got the wrong house. He killed the wrong fucking person.”

I looked up and I see Dr. Williams with tears in her eyes and Chase with this horrified expression of sadness and sympathy.

“Your file said your sister died at a young age but…nothing like what you just told me.”

“Ya I couldn’t tell them what happened. Too hard.”

Chase squeezed my hand and told me to continue. And I did.

“Ever since that day I’ve been seeing her every time I close my eyes. I was bullied every day for being the weird kid. One day I snapped. I wanted to die. I was seven years old and I wanted to die. I finally got my hands on a gun. You might be thinking..where the hell did a seven year old get a gun? I found it. We didn't live in the best neighborhood. My parents did their best to protect me from it but failed. It was to kete to save my inoccence. Not after that day. That day my parents weren’t home so I was going to do it. I was all ready to do it. My finger was on the trigger. Then my parents busted into the room. They started screaming and my dad went for the gun and it went off, hitting my mom in the head," I started sobbing. "My dad dropped the gun and it discharged. Hitting him in the heart. Both of them dead all in a matter of seconds. I went for the gun so I could join them in death but there were no more bullets. I screamed for my mom, my dad, and my sister. Everyone I ever loved was now dead. Gone. The police came and brought me here. To this place because everyone at school said I was crazy. Even the teachers. I had no friends to stick up for me. No one. I was all alone.”

“You’re not alone. You have me now,” Chase said gazing down at me.

“I know.”

I looked up at the dock who had tears streaming down her face. Then the weird ass bitch did something I never expected her to do. She…….hugged me.