" I haven't spoken to him, he's not answering calls or anything. I definitely think him finding out that she slept with multiple men, really threw him off. I'm pretty sure he was embarrassed. She said it in front of the whole fucking community."
" even if she was mad at him, why would she out her mother like that?" My mom sighed.
it has been a week since everything happened. I haven't heard from Josh. I know that he is alive because he looks at my messages. I know that he left for his business trip on Monday. Well, I'm guessing he left.
" we still have never confirmed or denied that we are together. So I feel like our situation is the last thing on his mind. Maybe." I sighed. " I was so scared about it coming out, and this is worse than I could've ever imagined, but I deserve that, I did this to myself. I did it as revenge but karma is not my job."
" I mean, you have always been impulsive. But you have always been a kind person. So kind that people have taken advantage of you. So don't blame yourself for this, you stood up for yourself. Do I believe that you could've handled things differently? Yes. You did what you needed to do to fulfill yourself."
" but her dad?" I sighed. " She was right, her dad was too far. Now I am in love with him and don't get me wrong. He is one of the best things that ever happened to me. But... I don't know. what would we tell our kids? How could we go through life?"
" you guys would just have to handle those things when they come up, you can't think about the negative all the time and expect positive. It's unfair."
" call mom I just don't understand why he's not talking to me." I sighed. "He stressing me out."
"He is just probably isolating himself."
" which may be a day or two it's all right. But how could you go so long without talking to me. I want to talk to him every second of the day mom. Call me clingy whatever you want to say. But I don't wanna go a day without speaking to him because I care about him, I want to know that you're alive. He doesn't even care if I'm alive or not."
" I don't think of it like that."
" I hate him." I sighed. "he doesn't love me." She sighed.
" Don't take what he does so personally."
" Well, I am." I sighed.
" are you about to cry?"
"No." I felt myself become hot with emotion. "No I am not." I shrugged off my emotions.
I don't even know why I am sad today. It's just one of those days, it has been easier because usually I could call Joshua and he would come. But he's ignoring me.
" OK."
" what if she convinced him to stop messing with me? What if he realized how messed up our situation was? I mean I can't blame him but communication would help."