" as a push gift, I want to car."
"What type of car?"
" maybe a tesla X, or a Benz truck." He nodded.
" Okay, we need to start getting our stuff together for this trip to Aspen, we need to order snow uniforms, and things like that. You know it usually takes a little while for stuff to get to us."
" we can figure that all out when we go home tonight. Babe, I've been really sad."
" what is bothering you?"
" nobody wants to throw me a baby shower. Macy is always in Vegas, her and Gia has two new babies that they need to take care of, they don't have the time. Cassie said no, I don't want to ask justice, because even though she may do it, she's been so busy with this semester of school. My mom has been so busy with the kids. It's just like everybody has so much going on and I do not wanna inconvenience anybody. I wanted a gender reveal and a baby shower, but I probably won't even have a baby shower let alone a baby shower and a gender reveal party." He nodded.
" I'll do that shit myself. If I have to, I'll ask somebody to set it up. You deserve every thing. You're having my fucking child, anything you want you are going to get. I don't know if it will be as special as it would, if you're friends were the ones to do it or even surprise you, but I will try my hardest to make everything that you wanted to happen. Maybe we can figure something out." I grabbed his hand.
right now we are coming from my appointment that I had this morning. I have been feeling like shit all morning, I don't know what it is because I haven't had morning sickness in a while. Even like mentally, I feel like I'm kind of sad because I was there for everyone during their pregnancy and I just feel like the energy is not reciprocated. Don't get me wrong. I know that they are busy with their newborns and things like that but it's like I can't ever have celebrations and things like that because I have nobody. And maybe I feel alone because of my hormones or whatever but I really feel like nobody really cares about me. Even the situation with Cassie is making me feel like shit because I thought no matter what she would've had my back. And that's just not my reality. Macy's all the way in Las Vegas, and it's like I've been so supportive to her pregnancy, and I called her every day, even when she was in Vegas the first time, I called her every day, checked on her and checked on the baby, even though the baby was in her stomach. I went out of my way for her and it's like I cant even get a text back. It does make me feel some type of way because it doesn't take anything to answer the phone or call me. It's always been us two against the world and maybe she's just growing up and I have no right to feel some type of way, but I do. It takes nothing to text me and check on me or call me, she doesn't do any of that. It's like she forgot that I even existed, I have to text her 10 times just to get a One worded response. I don't know if I did something wrong before she left. I don't know. Maybe I'm just overthinking it. Me and Gia talk every day. She has so much going on, the DNA test came back, and Benny is the father thankfully. So they are getting their shit together as a couple. I don't know I just feel like I'm really in the way and I'm an inconvenience for everybody.