• Lucky Me, I See Ghosts •

The Sharpener on the Desk

The last week of school till the Christmas break. Lucky was trying to study, He tried to clear his mind, he hasn't slept since.

His mind full of ways to solve his school work problems, suddenly imagines of her face popped in his mind. He was tired, but refused to sleep. His head full of what she did to him, it's like it opened a hole in his chests.

He got up and started another shower. Lucky vomited in the toilet before getting under the warm, steamy water. Its like he felt each and every drop of water hitting and dripping off his body.

The hole in his chest felt deeper, like he had to do anything just to get his mind off it, anything to feel like he was complete.

After his shower he had put on shorts and a T-shirt. Covered in his blankets he felt the light warm touch of them, reminded him of her hands on his thighs. He threw the blanket off him and onto the floor.

Lucky looks over at the blanket, than at his hands. The back of his hand so cold with a purple-ish bruise he didn't notice before. He touched it slightly. Even that sent a sharp pain to his whole arm, it felt fuzzy.

It hurt and looked painful. That made him fell full again. The painful looking bruise made him feel like he could distract himself from everything, the real world and the awful things that happen.

All he did was grab a small screwdriver and unscrew a pencil sharpener.

The blade was small and flimsy. He held it to his skin on the back of his wrist, the boney part.

It felt easy to him. He pushed the blade to his skin and slid making a thin line that quickly filled with blood. He felt his heart, felt his breath, he felt whole.

He made another small cut under the first one. The blood started dripping down. Tap...tap...

The blood fell on his legs. He didn't like it, but he did it again, just because he needed it, he needed to feel. The third cut was too fast, it was deeper the blood came out fast and fell more, it flooded his arm and fell off his leg, it dripped.

It was dark and thick, he panicked and threw the blade on his desk and ran to the bathroom.

There he tried looking for a towel or something to stop the bleeding. The blood was dripping, it was all over the tile floor staining it with red. He was panicking like crazy. He turned on the sink and put his wrist under it.

The water turned red and burned. He winced and pain and turned off the water the sink had pink lines and his wrist started bleeding again, but slower. He had no Band-aids, nothing.

He ran in the kitchen and got paper towels. The doorbell rings three times. He quickly hops to the door. He opens it with his hand on his chest holding the paper towel to his wrist.

Its the prostitute.

He felt a deep feeling in his chest, stomach, and tears forming in his eyes. She looked at him up and down, she was bumbled up in her heavy, thick coat. Her hair wet, she was breathing heavily, he could see her breath in the cold air.

It was bright out, the ground was cover in a thin layer of icy snow. She walks in shoulder checking him. "Jesus, it's so cold out."

Her accent made him fuzzy in the brain. She sat down on his couch, and started talking her shoes off, High-heeled boots. They had snow on them, he close the the door loudly.

"Wha, what are you doing here?"

"Why else would I be here?"

Those word floated in his mind, he knew what they meant. He was trembling holding back tears. He squished his wrist as the blood seeped  through. "Oh, shit what happened?"

"Oh, it was my- my- uh, cat."

"Dumb-Ass cat."

He looked at her, she sat at the couch. She took off her heavy coat, and had on a crop-top made of black leather. More fish nets on her arms. She had a collar on.

He looked away from her, he knew she was putting her hair up. "Sit down."
He quickly turned his head,"What?"
"Sit down." Lucky saw a pocket knife in her hand. He walked over and sat down.

He felt ill siting next to her. He would've thrown up if he'd eaten something, but he didn't.

She put her cold hands in his thighs, he jumped grabbing her wrist.

The paper towel fell off. They looked at each other, she quickly took her knife and cut his arm. warm blood dripped down.

He let go of her as she jumped on him pining him down and put one of his wrist under her elbow as her put the knife to his neck. "Don't try anything."

She licked his tears and stared to kiss his face and his neck. He cried quietly as she did. She stuck her tongue in his mouth, to him it felt cold and it slowly got warmer, moving fast back and forth in his mouth, making him gag.

She didn't stop, but pulled his hair and keep pushing the knife to his neck. His tears fell back to his ears.

She started going down, kissing his neck, biting it. She put the knife in her mouth, taking her top fish nets of and tied it on his wrist. Blood dripped down his arms and pulsated.

She moved down and puled his legs out. He quickly moved and kicked her in the stomach.

She fell and grabbed her stomach and let out loud moan from the pain.

He threw himself on the ground and ripped the fishnets off with his mouth.

She grabbed the knife and got on top him and pulled his hair tightly, more tears. The knife touched his skin on his neck,"I fucking love it when they try to run", she was breathing heavily in his face, "Don't make me kill you, it's not as fun when their dead."

She slid her legs underneath his legs pushing herself over his body keeping him down, with the knife to his neck, he was out of control. There was nothing he could do.

She did what she wanted. She touched him were ever she felt, she made him gag puting her tongue in his mouth, till he was used to it. She moaned, touching him, up and down, and anytime he screamed loud she pulled his hair hard and went faster and her tongue down his throat.

"Fucking, shut up-" She screamed at him, she took something from her bag and put in in her mouth and swallowed it, she puts another one in and kissed him and forced him to swallow it with her spit.

As soon as he took it he was unsure of what to think, but all he did was cry, tears with the sounds of screaming, his screaming then it fades into moaning, she was laughing and her tongue was in his mouth muffling his voice.

"I'm sorry!" She screamed out of nowhere,"I want you in my guts."

"No, no, no- please-stop!" He sobbed, more tears fell.

The fuzzy felling gone now he was numb. With nothing to do but wait, wait till she finished, wait till he died.