Johnlock oneshots

How could you do that to yourself(⚠️Trigger warning SH⚠️)

Word count: 549
AU: none

Sherlock's POV:

I looked down at the now bloody sink as tear stung my eyes.

I has gotten back into old habits recently. Ones I was not proud of at all. In fact I hated myself for all of it, cutting, or addiction.

I hate myself period.

I suddenly heard footsteps that I knew well.

John.

"Sherlock I'm home!"

I quickly turned on the tap and watched as the blood washed away.

I pulled my sleeve down and looked in the mirror.

"Sherlock where are you?" I heard John yell.

"I'm in the bathroom!" I yelled trying to sound annoyed. I quickly washed my face and turned off the tap. I walked out to see John in his chair drinking tea.

"Where's Rosie?" He asked.

"Mrs. Hudson took her out for ice cream since she did all of her chores," I responded simply and sat across from him on my own chair.

"Good. I need to talk to you about something," John said as he stared down at his tea.

"What is it then?" I asked. I knew exactly what it was. That's why two of my blades wer missing.

"I found this in the bathroom," he then held up blades from a razor and a pencil sharpener that were slightly rusted and had dried blood on them.

I felt the tears start to well up as I looked at the ground in shame.

"Sherlock," his voice cracked. "I thought we talked about this. I told you to tell me if your were having the thoughts again."

"This time I couldn't tell you thought," I said, nearly above a whisper.

"You can tell me anything," he leaned forward and rested his hand on my knee. I didn't look up. I didn't wanna see his disappointment.

"You'd hate me for it. You'd never wanna talk to me again," I stated.

"I could never," he said, moving his hand to lift my face up. "Please just tell me."

"I love... someone," I heisted. "But they'll never love me back."

"Oh..." he said.  Was that hurt? No of course not. "Why don't you just tell her?"

"Him."

"Oh?" John said sounding confused.

"I thought it was obvious, John. I'm gay." I said.

"Well I'm not that oblivious. It's just you looked at Irene a certain way-"

"John. Irene and I never were a thing. She never even liked me. We were simply friends." I told him.

"Well who is the lucky guy? Greg? Anderson?" He asked, fake smile on the whole time.

"You idiot!" I said slightly louder. "It's you. It's always been you!" I said quietly. I looked into his eyes and saw shock. You idiot! Why would you- wait was he smiling?!

"I've waiting so long for this.." he said. His eyes then flickered to my lips.

"Can I-"

"Yes." I then pulled him closer so our lips met. It wasn't lust or anything no. But it still meant the world to us. Tears of both sadness and joy were all we could taste. We pulled back with ghosts of smiles.

"I love you so much, Sherlock. Please don't do that to me again. Please..." he said, his voice cracking.

"I can't promise I won't think it. But I'll tell you. I promise that. I love you too"

𝑇ℎ𝑒 𝑒𝑛𝑑．