𝐁𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐨 𝐅𝐥𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 [𝐓𝐨𝐠𝐞 𝐈𝐧𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐢]

•Chapter 17•

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❝You mind smoke?❞
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'Why.' It's so easy to ask such a simple question, but sometimes the answers are anything but simple. Emotions aren't simple.

Lately you've been experiencing an abundance of feelings: happiness, frustration, terror, lovesickness; just to list a few, so perhaps your body just reached its limit.

Maybe you just need a break.

'But I shouldn't feel sorry for myself. I decided to do this knowing full well what awaited my decision.' But you didn't choose, and you know that. Your father exploited your talent to shed good light on his name, only for you to leave and become independent by 16. The only choice you ever made was to never come back, but even that was influenced by your father.

'Have I ever controlled anything in my life?'

'Is what I'm doing now of my own accord?'

'When will I truly break free from this controlling cyclone?'

You sit up in your cold bed, tears clumping your eyelashes as you try to hold them back. Nothing feels right. You feel empty, like a hole has been opened in your chest. Is this really how it's always been?

As if to keep you from stressing further, the door slides open swiftly without a knock as warning. In walks in a relatively tall woman without a speck of confidence to spare. Her arms rest lazily in her lab coat, which only added to her ghost-like appearance.

"Ieiri, your doctor. You mind smoke?"

"Huh?"

You eye the doctor, still hazy-eyed, as she examines the messy clipboard.

"God, I come back from my one vacation of the year to yet another patient. Gojo really needs to take better care of this kids..." she mumbles just above a whisper, her hands holding a thin cigarette before your response. Ieri rustles in the disheveled cabinet for a conveniently-placed ashtray, which she sets on your nightstand.

Tapping the end roughly with her bony fingers, she takes another heave before opening a window. 'She looks like a walking corpse...' you think with a grimace. Smoke always felt wrong in your lungs, like a cough that could never quite escape.

"I'm guessing you didn't take your pain killers? You're practically crying." You hurriedly wipe your eyelashes with your sleeve, embarrassed she saw your tears. "No, I took them. You can check the clipboard," you retort.

Without double-checking, she walks over and crushes her cigarette into the tray-- bits of ash and embers dancing around the blunt end.

"Stand up," her icy voice commands. Without hesitation, you shift your weight to your legs and slide off of the hard mattress. "Arms out." You raise them as high as possible before a sharp tinge causes you to wince. "Stay still for a minute."

Her expressionless face scans your chest, occasionally placing her hands on you to feel the ribs. After a few seconds she hovers them over a specific spot and doesn't move an inch.

"There. Raise your arms now." Following her command, you lift them until your arms brush against your ears, all without a drop of discomfort or exhaustion. With an exasperated sigh, she lights another cigarette and waves goodbye. "Stay here for another hour while Ijichi-kun finishes his report. He'll tell you more about your mission."