Omori Post-Ending- Aubrey's Truth

Only Children/Confession

 Hero and I left the hospital together. Silently. So much silence.

When we got to the parking lot, I kicked the tire of his car. Hero didn't stop me, only waited for me to grow tired.

Hero drove me home. Night was falling, and the clouds gathered ominously, but didn't fall. Static could be felt in the air. It didn't rain. The only thing that could be felt for miles around was dread.

When he dropped me off at my house, I didn't want to go inside. I was so tired of the trash strewn everywhere, the constant blaring of some stupid gameshow, always too loud, my mom's distant expression, the leak in the ceiling of my room, everything always broken. Fuck.

I'm just so tired of it all.

I watched the sidewalk go past as I walked down the street. By now it was completely dark, and the clouds blotted out the moon and stars, the only light came from within the houses. I walked a path I have walked many times before, in many similar situations, when I was so done with my mom.

Then I was on a familiar driveway, and a familiar doorstep, and a familiar, comforting orange door. This was the only place I felt safe anymore.

I rang the doorbell a good few times in a row and rested my forehead on the door.

Vance opened the door, and leaned against the doorframe, lollipop in mouth. "Hey Aubrey."

He shifted when I didn't answer. "Hey, Aubrey, you good?"

"Is Kim here?"

____________________________________________________________________________

"Is Basil here?"

Basil's mom chewed her lip, cigarette in hand. "Sure."

She left me alone in the doorframe and went back inside the house. Reluctantly, I followed.

I hadn't been in Basil's house very many times. The both of us always preferred to stay at Sunny and Mari's house or Kel and Hero's house. Basil's house was definitely nicer than mine was, though.

Basil's mom had some suitcases laid out in the living room, and she was in the kitchen, reheating something in the microwave. She continued to smoke and pointed towards the stairs without looking at me. I didn't see his dad.

Basil poked his head out of his room. "Aubrey?"

He gave me a small smile, but I could see the tear stains on his cheeks. I followed him into his room.

"Um. Hi." I said. I felt pretty stupid. What happened between us? We used to be so close. . .

"Hi." Basil said shyly. He sat on the floor and rocked back and forth, seemingly distracted by something behind me.

"Basil?"

"Huh?" He shook his head, focusing back on me.

"Why weren't you at school today?" I inquired. This wasn't a talk between friends. This felt like an interrogation.

Silence. Always that fuckling silence.

Basil rocked back and forth on his bed. I stood in his doorway.

"Can I look at the photo album?"

"Uh. Sure. Okay."

He got up and picked up a big book and put it on the ground. I sat next to him until our knees were touching. He edged away.

I swallowed.

"I just . . . I just want to see her again."

Silence. When I gained the courage to look him in the eyes, they were scared, empty, and regretful, and something else, too.

I took a deep breath and opened the photo album.

Mari, Mari Mari, beautiful, perfect Mari.

Some photos were missing in the album. They were just- gone. All those photos of Mari, all those memories- just gone.

I could feel my voice begin to quake, and I tried to swallow it back. "Basil.... Where is she?"

"I-I-," Basil stuttered. He was afraid too. He could feel it too. He could feel the ringing, and the throbbing, and the fuzzy sounds of the HVAC, the rift breaking between us.

"Please."

"Basil."

I took his hand and turned to face him.

"You know you can tell me anything Basil."

I swallowed back the lump in my throat and tried to resist the burning in my eyes, the tears that wanted to fall.

Basil began to quiver, and I could tell he was holding back tears too.

"You can tell me what you did with her photos."

I held Basil in my arms, trying to resist the ringing in my head that wanted me to punch him in the face that wanted to hurt him.

"You can tell me anything. I won't be mad, I promise."

But that was a lie.

"So Basil, just tell me what's going on"

I brought him closer until all I could feel was his chest rising and falling, rather unevenly I stared into those cold icy eyes of his, so afraid of so many things that I wish I could protect him from.

"Just tell me what's wrong."

Nothing.

I let the tears fall.

And I left.

I wasn't wanted there.

I glanced back at him as I left.

"I thought us only children stuck together."

The ringing didn't leave my head, even when I left the pocket dimension of Basil's room. When I came out of his house I slammed the door behind me, then kicked one of his potted plants as hard as I could.

The succulent fell to the ground and the pot shattered.

"Dammit." I cried.

I'm a monster.

I take away everything from everyone.

And everyone has taken everything away from me.

What's the point?

____________________________________________________________________________

"Is Kim here?"

Vance shrugged, crunching on his lollipop. It smelled . . . grape-flavored. "In her room I guess. I can get her for you."

He turned around and hollered without my answer. I suppose he already knew what I was going to say.

"KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMmmm"

"WHAT?"

"AUBREY'S HERE."

There was no response, other than the faint noise of shuffling coming from the back of the house.

Vance shrugged again and left the door open, candy wrappers trailing in his wake.

Kim appeared at the door, pushing her glasses up, hair disheveled.

I pulled her into me, and closed the door behind us.

"Woah Aubs, you okay?"

"I thought I didn't care about them anymore! I've spent the past four years just trying to move on, trying to forget about them like they forgot about me, and now that they're trying to be a part of my life they're ruining it. I told myself I didn't care but I always come back-"

"Slow down, it's going to be okay."

Kim pulled me close and held me to her chest, calming me down. I melted into her, tears falling, just as they always did.

"We're messed up. We're so messed up."

"Aubs, it's okay- I'm here now, you can tell me anything."

I wish I could.