A Hint of Spice

Chapter 18

I flipped the pancakes and hummed along to my iPod that played on the iHome. I spun around, my hair in a high ponytail. I poured some milk into a cup and counted the number of pancakes stacked on the plate. 16 so far. I had 4 more cooking. Placing the finished pancakes on the plate I turned to see Zayn at the bottom of the stairs.

"Are you alright?" I asked unplugging the griddle and setting the spatula down. Zayn nodded and made his way to the table and sat. I set the pancakes in the middle of the table and another plate in front of Zayn. I set forks and knifes next to both Zayn's and my plate. The syrup already sat on the table as I waited for him to set a stack of 4 pancakes on his plate. He took the peanut butter and spread it across the top pancake. He continued to spread the creamy peanut butter on each pancake. "So Zayn, do you live here in Oklahoma?" I asked.

He shook his head as he chewed the chunk of pancake in his mouth. "I used to live in Britain. I came here for something to do.." I giggled. "What?" He asked eye balling me.

"It's just that.." I laughed. "You come here for something to do and you end up getting beat up if not for a girl!" My hand covered my mouth as I laughed.

"Hey, not to mention you. Either you live here with your dad and a boyfriend that took off or..." He stumbled on his last words, unsure of what to say.

"Or I live with my boyfriend back in London and came here to visit my father." I finished the sentence for him, stating my reason for being in Oklahoma. "So, Zayn, do you have a girlfriend?" I cut into my syrup coated pancakes and put the chunk of pancakes into my mouth, chewing slowly.

He shook his head. "Used to.. She was great. Her name was Christy. She was sweet and caring but I had to leave her. She's back in a small town near London. I told her I'd be back for her sometime, but I don't know if I could ever go back." He looked at his plate.

"Why not bring her here?" I asked setting my fork down next to my empty plate.

He shook his head quickly. "No."

"Why not?" I asked.

"Because Christy is crazy. She always wants to be by me and always wants to be touching me. She has to be all over me all of the time. It gets annoying.."

"It's ok, I understand." I smiled and stood, taking the empty plates to the sink. Zayn brought the syrup, butter and peanut butter to me, which I put away. I smiled at him before making my way upstairs and into the shower.

**

I got out, grabbing a towel and wrapping it around myself. I quickly dried myself and got dressed. I brushed my hair and looked at myself in the mirror. Why did Niall like me? My blonde hair had taken to brown when it was wet. My blue eyes had grown somewhat dull over the years. My face bear no make up. Growing up I was teased by my friends about people I liked, and I hated it. The guys would tease me about being a man. Everyday I woke up and looked at myself wondering why people thought I was pretty. I always wanted to be pretty and skinny like the other girls. I acted like my brother, wearing basketball shorts and t-shirts that was somewhat loose. I tried to change, tried to become a girly girl, but it didn't really work. There was one guy who cared and a few girl friends who cared but I could never think of myself as beautiful because of my past.

I bit my lip, remembering middle school and grade school. I couldn't stand anything back then. And now, I have this gorgeous boy who protects me and wants me to feel secure and loved. I did. I dreamed about when I was older and would get a boyfriend that truly cared about me. Niall treated me like a princess, that's all I wanted. That's all I ever wanted.

My eyes drifted to the necklace around my neck. The silver chicken wing resting on my chest. My breath hitched in my throat as I looked at myself. Tears boiled up in my eyes as I walked into my bedroom. I flopped onto the bed and sobbed into my pillow, keeping it quiet so Zayn wouldn't hear. My phone buzzed next to me.