Ninjago Oneshots

Two sides of me

Y'all, this story is gonna get dark. I came up with it when I was supposed to be sleeping, so just bare with me. 'Kay, onto the trigger warning! TW- Suicidal thoughts, swearing, self-harm, and attempted suicide.  On a much happier note, Lloyd is an adult!

Jay's P.o.v.

I stare at the mirror. What did the other see in me? I am weak, worthless, and unloved. No, no! I'm better than this! The thoughts aren't true! That's what Zane told me.

But does Zane really care? I bet he just said that to make you shut up! No one really cares about you! I cover my ears.

"No, NO, NO! IT'S NOT TRUE!" I shout.

"What's not true?" A voice asks. I turn around and saw Lloyd leaning against the doorway, a concerned look on his face. Shit. I feel my face go red.

"N-Nothing." I choke out. Lloyd crosses the room.

"You sure?" He asks. I nod.

"Y-Yup, all good!" Crap, crap, crap!  I need to stop stuttering! He doesn't look away from my face and moves a little closer. "I'm just tired. I just need some sleep." I fake a yawn. He doesn't look convinced, but he nods anyway.

"I'll leave you alone, then." He turns and leaves. The thoughts are building up again. I rush to the bathroom. I hate it. I hate doing it. But it's the only thing that makes the pain stop. I grab the razor. I roll up my sleeve. Taking a deep breath, I start.

One. They don't love you.

Two. You're ugly.

Three. Worthless.

Four. Waste of space.

Five. Annoying.

Six. Stupid.

Seven. Disappointment.

Eight. No one cares.

Nine. Weak.

Ten. Just kill yourself already.

Eleven.

Finally, no more thoughts. I rinse out the cuts, wincing from the pain. I wrap the cuts in a bandage and head back to my room. I yawn. I guess I really am tired. I lay down in bed. After a few minutes, I hear Lloyd come by. The floor squeaks as he crosses the room. I remember my wrist. Shit! I never covered it with my blanket. The bed shifts as he sits next to me.

"What the..." Shit. He saw it. I'm screwed. He unwraps the bandages partly. I watch him through my eyelashes. I see his eyes widen. "Jay..." He whispers. I see tears welling up in his eyes. Fuck. I didn't mean to hurt him. I jerk my arm away, curling into a ball. I start crying. I hear him stand, and then the door closing. He doesn't care. He probably left. I feel someone's arms wrap around me. He came back! But.. why? He's probably just gonna laugh at me.

"I'm not gonna laugh." I hear him promise. How did he know what I was thinking? "You said it out loud. All of it."

"O-Oh." I don't say anything. I feel the tears slip down my face, dropping onto the bedsheets.

"Jay... look at me." I roll over and look at him. "You're gonna be okay. I'll take care of you."

"Really?" I ask him. He nods. I hug him. He tightens his grip.

"Do me a favor," He says. "The next time something like this happens, come find me." I nod into his shirt. I don't know how long he holds me, but I eventually fall asleep. When I do, my dreams aren't nightmares for once.