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It was a Sunday, which meant that she didn't have to go to work. On most of her days off, she'd spend them resting up for another upcoming hectic week as she would be too tired to anything else. But Aleyah had woken up with a lot more energy than usual, and she decided to do something more productive.
The house was in terrible shape and not just because of the peeling paint or the rain-soaked roof, It was also extremely dirty. Although the two siblings didn't have an abundance of furniture, their place was small enough to make it seem like it was overpacked.
Aleyah had started with her quarters in the corner of the living room. That's how she found herself slumped against the wall with a book she hadn't seen in years. She skeemed through the pages before stopping on the last written one.
The entry was from when she was sixteen. It was unreal how it felt like a lifetime ago when it was only just two years prior. Aleyah didn't even have to read the passage to know what it was about. She wrote it a few months after her mother had been diagnosed with lung cancer, when she had finally come to terms with the fact that her future wouldn't be what she imagined.
The passage was the final place Aleyah could allow herself to be selfish. The place where she could write about all the dreams and opportunities she had and would have to miss because her mother had gotten sick. Where she could complain about all the struggles she had gone through, only to succumb to be her mother's caretaker. A place where she made wishes that would take her back in time so she could be more adamant about her mother's smoking problem. A place where she gave up her happiness to provide others with theirs.
Reading the journal hurt. It was a type of hurt lodged deep within, a creeping ache she had managed to hide despite it festering for years. The book also awarded her with a sense of longing. A desperate reach for a life she could've had. A life that had seemed so reachable before it turned into impossible in only a matter of days.
And with that longing came hope, in its own cruel fashion. With all of the stress and struggles she went through, the girl had forgotten what it was like to want something for herself. Aleyah was always so worried about what was needed for August. She never took a moment of personal luxury, no matter how small it was. She couldn't remember the last time she had ice cream or even a soda.
And once the self-realization set in. Aleyah made an internal promise that she'd try her very best to allow herself some happiness, no matter how minimal. She deserved it. And so, she carried on with the housework, already knowing the first luxury she was going for.
.....
Jude stopped coming.
It had been a full week, and he made no appearance. Aleyah had eventually concluded that he wouldn't return. She had expected him not to do so, but she still held out a sliver of hope that he'd show up and continue to pursue her. It wasn't a lie that he was somewhat succeeding in his prior efforts, and the girl was getting closer and closer to giving in. However, now that he'd ceased his visits, Aleyah couldn't help but feel disappointed.
