Poems when I have overwhelming feelings

Manic Episode

This is just a word vomit since I haven't taken my meds in a week :)

Every night I lay awake, my head aches as the lines of stories untold control my thoughts. Anytime I try to stretch and separate, the feeling comes back like two magnets held centimeters away from one another, pushing and pulling, growing and shrinking. My mind moves more violently than the ocean during a thunderstorm. My intrusive thoughts aiming for the right time to strike like lightning at a tree. The nimble flash and then a loud thunderclap. The noise shakes me as I re-enter the real world, my mind coming back instantly as the furious gods take out their anger. I wish I could hit my wall as hard as the gods do when fighting one another. A quick punch and a hole, the hole I wish was between my eyes. I stared down the wall like I do myself in the mirror. A stranger looks back at me, I blink, they blink. Every move I make, they make. I then realize this ugly monstrosity looking back at me is none other than myself. I do to the mirror what I want between my eyes. Shards of glass between my toes like sharp sand. A larger piece in my hand as I carve into my skin. The glass glides so smoothly as the red liquid pours out of the open wound. I drop the larger shard as I hear a door open.. A voice is heard and my legs shake. My arms feel like they are leaking more sweat than blood. My eyes water and  I feel like falling backwards into a hole just to disappear forever.