Vows of Misfortune

16.

I woke up with my head throbbing and pounding on the side of my head. What happened to me last night? I couldn't remember much. Just that there were people I was climbing over and drinking other people's beer mugs.

There was nothing else that clicked in my head. Had I done something? Clearly not 'cos I was safe and sound. Wait a second. I pushed the blankets off my body and I paused. How did I even get here? And what was that smell? I sniffed myself. I reeked of vomit. Oh God, I needed to take a nice, hot shower to get rid of this disgusting smell.

I was a mess like this in front of Romir and his friends? Okay, so I shouldn't care but still. I hated that I was a complete, out-of-control mess who didn't know how to control emotions.

Turning my head, as always, the pillows that I'd placed between us as a barrier were intact and Romir's side of the bed was made and clean. No sign of life, at all.

It wasn't until after I showered and changed into loose cotton pyjamas that I felt like myself again. Opening and closing my eyes didn't ache.

Rubbing my head didn't seem to ease the ache though and I shuffled out of the room. Jose uncle was watching TV and turned his head when he heard me.

"Good afternoon." Afternoon? "I saved a sandwich for you."

Bless his soul. I knew Romir had meant that for Jose uncle, but my stomach grumbled so loudly that I didn't even care to protest.

"Did you eat?" I said through a mouthful of tomato and shredded curried chicken. Wow, Romir made this? It tasted bloody amazing. I took another bite.

"I did. He made me two. I was full with one, anyway." I knew he meant to save me one. I smiled internally.

"Thanks." I wiped at my mouth to get rid of any crumbs. "Do you have any painkillers, by the way? My head is killing me."

"In the middle drawer over by the front." He pointed to the hall so I went down there. He was talking about the wooden antique drawer pushed up against the wall nearby the front door. I took two medicines and washed them down with water, waiting for the effect to kick in and to feel better again.

"I feel like I got run over by a truck," my voice came out all deep and croaky.

"Go take a nap, sweetie."

"Ugh, I don't want to take a nap again." Not only did I not want to sleep in that gross bedsheet — which I needed to change because of probable vomit stains — but I also didn't want to take a nap and wake up groggy again. I already did that once and I wasn't about to do it again.

"Want to watch a movie with me, then?"

I shrugged. "Sounds good. Let me go to the bathroom first." I grabbed my phone and headed to the toilet. I checked my phone first on instinct only to see that I had a message from Varun.

Wait, why was he messaging me? My eyebrows lifted, easing the creasing on my forehead when I realised that I had messaged him first. Oh my god. I slapped my forehead, the sharp sting a welcome punishment for my actions.

Varun: Call me. We need to talk.

The only reason he wanted to talk to me when he didn't before was so that he could feel better about himself. Be the 'better' person and forget the guilt that would come with cheating on someone because at least he could tell a bunch of people that he 'tried' to mend things with me.

Piece of dog shit. I wanted to cry like the pathetic piece of shit I was. I ripped a toilet paper square and placed it on the tap next to the sink and did my business. After, I came out feeling like a zombie. The headache had subsided but the pain in my chest that I wanted to numb, came back in full force and I swear it was like someone clawing my heart open.