Vows of Misfortune

36.

Hanging out with him wasn't actually that bad.

For the first time in a long time, I was belly-laughing, the sides of my stomach aching so much that I thought I was going to be in a bent position for life.

"Stop," I said through my tears, my broken breathing. "I can't breathe."

He looked at me like he didn't understand me. "I didn't even say anything funny."

"So you being given CPR by a man with long hair, who you thought was a chick and tried to make out with, isn't funny?"

"I was fourteen."

"Still funny."

A flutter of giggles still made its way through my lips but I rolled them in to try and stop it. I wiped my eyes to get rid of the tears.

The waitress came over holding a big tray with a stack of waffles, Neapolitan ice cream of white, pink and brown with chocolate sauce, caramel syrup, sprinkles, wafers sticking out from the sides and a glazed cherry on top.

Romir narrowed his eyes at the delicacy in front of us.

"I told you it was huge." I blew out my cheeks. "I still can't believe you ordered the largest and most expensive thing on the menu."

"You're the one paying. Figured I had to make it special." He handed over the long dessert spoon; one for me and one for him.

"Sadist," I muttered. I ignored the cocky little grin on his face though my stomach flipped. "You forgot that I'm gonna be eating it, too, so it'll be worth the money." I clinked my spoon with his.

"What was that?"

"What was what?" He awkwardly demonstrated the clink. "Oh, I was saying cheers."

He tilted his head. "By tapping my spoon?"

"Well, we don't have alcohol and there aren't any glasses so...it's the next best thing." He gave me a weird look but the jittery excitement of wanting all of the ice cream and soggy waffles in my mouth coursing through me made me overlook it. "Dig in already!"

My first bite was a bit of everything and I leaned back and moaned, my eyes closed. "This is so good," I said, mouth full. "Why have I never ordered this before?"

"Because you're broke."

I kicked him from under the table. His jaw clenched, lips closing over the spoon. He glared at me through his lashes and I flashed him an innocent smile.

"Oops, my foot slipped." I scooped another spoonful and was about to place it in my mouth when my shin was lightly kicked. The spoon fell back from my hand and into the pile. "Romir!"

"Oops," he mocked, "my foot slipped."

"I hate you," I said, but I was laughing.

"This is pretty good," said Romir after a few bites. "Heavy, but still good."

"The ultimate way to enjoy gaining weight."

"I agree."

There were people walking past by the window we were seated next to, couples holding hands in the cold. I shivered just thinking about having to go back outside in my thin outfit.

Maybe I should have brought a jacket. My mind then redirected to Romir's bike, chilling outside all alone when I remembered something.

"Oh, by the way," I said, turning back to Romir, "did you get the 500 pounds that I transferred to your account?"

Romir didn't look up. "I don't need it. I transferred it back."

"What do you mean—"

"I paid the fine, Arshia." I remembered the words that he said on the bike the other day. So he was being genuine about it? Still, it kind of made me feel like shit. Like I was using him.

"You really didn't need to do that," I said softly.

"I told you. We're married. We share burdens."

Since when did we share burdens? Weren't we supposed to not interfere? He's trying to be amiable, Arshia. That's all you ever wanted, remember?

And now that he was trying I was treating him like shit.

I sighed. "Well, thank you. That's...oddly sweet of you." I took another spoonful of chocolate ice cream, letting the cold melt into the warmth of my tongue. Watching Romir sit opposite me, smiling and laughing despite all the rudeness I'd shown him made me pause. "I also want to apologise." I waited for Romir to look up at me. "For being a brat to you the entire time we've known each other and for snooping around your business."

"It wasn't just you," he finally said. "I'd been nothing but an asshole to you." He tapped his spoon against the plate before placing it down fully. "When we got married my situation wasn't exactly great."

I waited for him to continue, feeling the playful air plunge into something darker, deeper.

"My ex-girlfriend," he hesitated, speaking as if he had shards of glass in his mouth and it physically hurt him, "left because she didn't want a life with me anymore. She wanted something more. Something I couldn't give her."

My heart cracked; this guy had been through something traumatic and here I thought I was the only one going through heartbreak. My chin trembled but I ground my teeth to reign it in and took a deep breath.

"Maybe she was the one that couldn't give you what you wanted," I whispered. He looked up at me. I held his gaze. The words resonated with myself as well.

Things really did happen for a reason and the other partner leaving wasn't a tribute to our failure as a partner. It was actually significant of the other person and their failure to be a good partner to us.

I'd been so focused on blaming myself and hating Varun that I'd forgotten the truth. "I'm sorry," I said, dipping my head down to hide the tears that were probably glazing my vision.

"It's fine." His own voice was hard, tittering on the edge of losing self control. He cleared his throat. "You might be right. I've been caught up in the past for too long."

"Can I ask what exactly was your past?" I hoped he trusted me enough to be vulnerable.

Romir licked his lips. "Losing my sister, being..." He hesitated, glancing at me before dragging his gaze away, features rock solid. The dessert was long forgotten. "paid to steal and...hurt other people took a toll on me for a long time."

My spoon dropped from my hand and I was pretty sure my jaw had also dropped in the most exaggerated way. I probably would only be able to close it if I physically shoved my chin up to meet my teeth.

He was what?!