Zenande Okhethiweyo

Insert 86

I have spent the last hour trying to remember what I dreamt about. It might be something that can help today but I can't even remember one detail no matter how hard I try.
I'm wearing the red Seshweshwe outfit I was given by uGogo on the day of my uMembeso ceremony. A high waisted,long and flowy skirt which has pockets to put my phone in. A crop top which doesn't show my stomach thanks to the skirt and a matching doek. Due to today's ceremony all of the Zulu wives will be wearing Tswana shawls with tassels,which is what I'm wearing. No hair is showing also we had to cover all our hair.

I'm in the kitchen having left over pap with amasi,at 2:55am. None of the wives are in the kitchen yet but I guess that would be useless since everything will begin once me and Zano return.
Zano walks in wearing dark green overalls as I'm washing the few dishes in the sink.
"Cedile?"(Are you done?) He asks.
"Yeah let's go" I say wiping my hands and taking my phone from the counter as I follow him to the car. We get into his Brabus and he drives out.
Ever tried to remember something that is so close yet so far at the same time? I feel like if I close my eyes for a second then the dream will come back to me but yet again it is all so blank like I'm trying to remember something that never happened.
"Mommy uright?" Zano asks.
"I can't remember what I dreamt of last night and I'm scared that it might have to do with today and now things could go wrong just because I can't remember a fucken dream!" I say at one go and hitting the back of my neck on the seat.
This is frustrating honestly.
"Haa aah mama calm down. You know there are some dreams that you remember when something related to it happening and if it's useful today then I have no doubt that you will remember it along the way,maybe not all of it but the useful parts and if you don't remember it totally don't beat yourself up about it means it was just a useless dream which didn't relay any message." He says as he puts his hand on my thigh for reassurance.
Come to think of it that happens so me sometimes,he is right I will remember it if it's meant to be remembered. I should just stop stressing over it.
"Uqinisile baby I should just breathe"(You are right) I say putting my hand over his and giving him a smile.
"I'm always right ke mina. You can't afford to be tatazeling when you are the senior wife namhlanje" he says shaking his head causing us to laugh.
He isn't up for the idea that I will be playing Ma's role,I think it's just his jealousy talking because I have to serve baba before I can attend to him. He has been complaining about that ever since.
"Umona Mageba"(Jealousy) I say laughing even harder.
"Akuna mona nex la these ancestors are forgetting that you are MY wife not a clone of my mother." He says.
I squeeze his hand because I know that this entire issue dies not sit well with him. At first I thought that everything that is happening with me doesn't bother him but boy was I wrong. He finally told us how he feels,Cele included. He says that the ancestors are just selfish trying to bring back their favorite daughter through me. He said that today they are making me fulfill her duties and then the next thing they will be telling me to fulfill that duty in bed also. When he said that I almost fainted and to my surprise Cele had the opposite reaction,he actually laughed until tears came out of his eyes,I have never seen him laugh at all so I was really surprised. Because of Zano's view point Cele ended up telling him to help me with everything that the ancestors command me to do.
"You know that's not true baby. I'm your chosen wife,chosen by them to make sure that this family soars to even greater heights. Our love is for the history books,our story will be told to our great grandchildren. A love story written by the ancestors themselves,A love so pure that we fell in love with each other's imperfections. They are not trying to make me a clone because you my dear husband are nothing like baba." I say.
He looks at me and gives me a genuine smile.
"Waze waba romantic mkami namhlanje ufuna ini a new bag?" He asks.
I burst out in laughter as I playfully hit his shoulder.
"I was just telling you the truth babakhe but a new bag wouldn't hurt" I say after laughing.
"Ngazile"(I knew it) He says laughing.

He parks the car by the river,Cele is already here. We get out and greet him as he lights candles of different colours around. He tells us to get down on our knees and talk to our ancestors. Zano leads the way because he is the one that has to call on them by saying his clan names. After talking to them we get up and Cele confirms that they heard us because a light breeze runs over us. I turn my head to the river and see a familiar flower gloating on top. I walk to the side and pick it up without getting wet. Then I remember where I know it from,my dream.
"Baba uMa said that this will help bring Lwandle back to us" I say handing it to Cele.
He looks at it confused but nods at me as he puts it in his bag.
"Kukhona okunye akushilo?"(Is there something else she said) he asks.
I tell him that I don't remember and then he tells me that when I do remember something then I should immediately let him know because he needs guidance on what he is expected to do.Zano also looks confused but he keeps quiet as we drive Bab' Cele back to his house. He says he will see us tomorrow for the strengthening ceremony because he is not needed today.
I remember something as we pull out of his gate after dropping him off.
"Baba uMa said that his name is Thandoluyaphilisa Izanokuhle Zulu!" I shout luckily he is close by so he heard me. He starts groaning and then rests his hands on his knees as he shakes his head. His wife rushes to him and tells us that we can leave as she helps him to his hut.