Apricity (l.s.)

chapter ten

We walk back to the living room as soon as Elia's all changed and washed and confirms that she at least feels slightly better.

"Daddy", she whispers, reaching her arms out for Harry as soon as she spots him, "Louis give me medicine and I'm healthy now."

Harry chuckles a little, taking her from me and kissing the top of her head as he pulls her closer. He takes a fluffy blanket and covers both of them with it, wrapping his arms around Elia.

"I'll warm up the food and make some tea if you want me to", I say, trying to ignore that growing warmth in my tummy when watching them.

Harry and Elia both nod, smiling in a similar way, shy but grateful, and I smile back as I take the bag with the food from the table, feeling a bit overwhelmed with all of this.

While the food is in the microwave and the water has started boiling, I unload and re-load the dishwasher and clean the kitchen before heading back to the living room with three cups of tea and returning to the kitchen shortly after to get our food.

"I'm going to eat here, if that's okay with you."

"Obviously is", Harry says, brushing through Elia's curls as she stares at the TV, "I'll pay you anyways, Louis, I'll pay you for all of this, thank you."

"Harry, stop it. I'm doing this as a friend, okay? If it makes you feel better, pay for the food and medicine but please not for anything else."

He bites his bottom lip, and blinks a few times but fails to stop a tear running down his cheek. He immediately wipes it away with the back of his hand and I don't really know how to react other than smile at him reassuringly.

"Thanks", he breathes, "I appreciate you."

I smile back and whisper a quite "You're welcome" before helping Elia off Harry's lap, setting her between us and placing the now cool enough bowl on her lap.

"How do you feel, darling?", I ask, brushing over her cheek with my finger, "A little bit better?"

She nods quickly. "A little. And I love Peppa Pig and noodles."

"Well, that does sound quite good", I say, "Enjoy the food then."

She doesn't reply anymore, already focused on the series again. I hand Harry, who doesn't look like he can really get up, his meal as well before reaching for mine.

We watch TV in silence while eating and by the end, Elia struggles to keep her eyes open, so Harry takes her into his lap again, brushing over the back of her head until she's asleep, mouth opened slightly, hair begining to get sweaty again.

"Do you want me to carry her to bed?", I ask Harry, nodding towards Elia. He nods so I carefully lift her off of his lap and carry her to Harry's bedroom. I lay her down and cover her with one blanket hoping it won't make her shiver or start sweating again.

I suddenly have an urge to press a kiss on her forehead but somehow resist because I'd probably overstep with that so instead just brush over her hair once before walking back into the living room.

I drop onto the couch next to Harry and smile at him a little. He tries smiling back but ends up having to wipe another tear running down his cheek.

"So sorry", he whispers, "I really am. I'm usually not like this. I don't want you to assume that I don't have any of this under control. I usually manage everything."

''Maybe that's the problem" I whisper, reaching my hand out to brush over his upper arm reassuringly, "Maybe that's precisely what you're doing wrong, Harry, there's no way you can manage any of this alone."

There are more tears running down his cheeks now and he tries to wipe them away but fails as they only start to increase. "Can I give you a hug?", I ask, unable to resist.

He shrugs then nods. "But I'm sick", he adds as if I didn't know that, ignoring what he just said, I wrap my arms gently around him as he hides his face in my sweater, letting more tears flow.

"It's okay, Harry. I'm here for you, alright? I got you; I'll be there for you until you two aren't sick anymore, and afterwards as well, if you want me to."

He nods into my shoulder and I suddenly feel like crying myself, maybe because of sadness or pity or maybe because it feels nice having him so close to me in that moment.

He pulls away after some time, looking a little embarrassed as he wipes his cheeks dry and crosses his arms in front of his chest. "Sorry", he repeats again for what feels like the millionth time, voice cold and distant again.

"Don't apologize. Maybe it's time you get into bed too. I'll get you a glass of water alright?"

"I'll get it myself, it's okay", he says, attempting to get up. I grab him by the shoulder and pull him back down, letting my hand rest on his shoulder until I'm sure he won't try to get up again.

"Don't worry about it, Harry. Please, it's nonsense, let me get the goddamn water for you."

He doesn't say anything but doesn't protest either so I get up after a while, filling a glass with tap water and getting some of the pills he needs to take as well.

I hand it all to him and he doesn't say anything but drinks the whole glass and takes the pill so I suppose he's thankful for it. I can pretty much feel the tension around him, feel the way he thinks he messed up.

"Do you want to stay overnight? It's pretty late already."

I nod. "I'll take the couch. I'll probably be gone when you wake up but I'll check in on you after uni, yeah?"

He nods. "Thank you", he says, voice without emotion. He gets up and walks to the door and I already try to get settled on the couch when he turns around again.

"It all means a lot. Goodnight, Louis."

~~~

are we making progressssss?

hope you liked it <3