Livid Love

"Beg For It"

I wake at 4am, tossing and turning the whole two hours I was asleep for, I sit up in bed and look around the room, the moon shines directly in the window, casting a beam of light onto Ghosts bed. I pick up my phone and I make my way into the kitchen by using the flash. I really shouldn't be drinking but desperate times call for desperate measures, pour myself a glass of red wine and I pull on my insulated jacket. I step outside into the freezing air and I immediately notice the sky is lit up with a billion sparkling stars all over the sky like salt sprinkled on a dark cloth. I sit on a step on the stairs and I lean my head against the railing. 

Today went horribly, I got harassed by two men in one night, how shitty is that. At least I had Ghost to comfort me while I cried. I want to tell him about how I'm feeling so so much, but I don't want him to be worried about me and distracting him from the mission. I'm not the type to confide my feelings in a person just because they offer, I wish I was that type of person. 

I dig around the dirt with my feet, making patterns with the edge of my shoes as I sip my wine. I put the glass beside me and rest my chin in the palms of my hands. I stare into the distance as I listen to a nearby stream trickling, the silence, the coolness hitting my face, the random owl flying by me every now and again. I become sleepy very fast, my head falls off my hand and I nod off to sleep.

...

My eyes flutter open to reveal James and Ghost looking down at me, James is holding a spade in one hand and a bag of dirt in the other. Ghost is wearing a grey loose t-shirt with some tracksuit pants.

"Could you put her back to bed for me? My back wouldn't be able to carry another person"

"Of course, do you know why she's out here?"

"No, but she was drinking" he said pointing to the glass above me

Ghost bends down and lifts me up, he then scoops me into his arms and starts walking inside. I pretend to still be asleep as it would just be awkward if I suddenly woke up while in his arms. He enters our bedroom and he places me on my bed, he holds me up while he slips my coat off me and places it on the ground beside me. He lays me back down and pulls the covers over me. I shiver and he stands up and takes the duvet off of his bed and lays it on top of me smoothening it out. He sits down beside me and looks at me.

Fuck it

I open my eyes and sit up, I wrap my arms around him, embracing him in a hug, he sits there surprised at my sudden awakening but he then slowly wraps his arms around my back, hugging me back.

"Thank you" I whisper

"For what" he says gently

"I don't know"

"You don't know?"

"No, and I'm ok with that" I smile

We lay there, hugging each other until I hear his breathing even out and I know he's asleep.  I let go of his embrace and I cross my legs, resting my elbows on my knees, now it's my turn to look at him. His arms lay limp from where I was laying and his eyes are softly closed, he has blonde eyelashes. He's so cute. I can't deny I have a huge crush on him now. His arms are very toned yet he holds me so carefully, like I'm china that can be broken easily. He shifts in his sleep, lying down in front of me. I'm incredibly tired from the last day so I lay down and snuggle into him, falling asleep in his arms.

...

I awake to see Alejandro standing at the bottom of the bed smirking

"Hello? Y/n? Are you done snuggling with hermosa here because Mary's making pancakes for breakfast, wake up your boyfriend too."