through the sand, for you. (gaara x reader)

chapter thirty two

Authors note 

~

Psst. Remember I have another book 'organised chaos.' its a bakugo x reader! 

Make sure to check it out! Also thank you so much for the 10K on this book.

I love you all so much <3

I made it home. I was in so much of a rush that it took me a double take to realise my door was unlocked. My breath hitches, and with hesitation, I raise my voice and sharpen my tone. "Hello? Who the hell is in here?"

I hear metal kitchenware clank, and a female just a little taller than me sticks her head out, "Hi."

Temari's voice is meek. And I am confused and honestly too tired to deal with another sand sibling's outburst. "What are you doing here?"

"Cooking..." She slips back behind the wall, returning with a pot in hand, "trying to make up with you."

I slip my shoes off, shut and lock the door behind me. I walk towards her with my arms out. The blonde put the pot back down and accepted my hug. I tightly hold her in my embrace, and under my breath, I say, "next time, don't scare the shit out of me." She gives a hearty giggle and apologises.

I set the table as Temari finishes serving out the food. She has made a lot, so thankfully, I will have lunch tomorrow. We had a light conversation, and she apologised again. This time was for how she acted and reacted to me the few days before this one. I return the apology lightly, saying I may have overreacted. Still, she needs to be understanding of what is happening right now. We have gone through a lot in the last few weeks, which has taken a toll on us. Making me realise these are just some of the times when you need your friends the most. We don't address the adamant fall of peace in the ninja world, but it is layered in the air. Thick and uncomfortably sorrowful. We call it a night, even though it is early morning. I stripped off the unnecessary clothes and curled up into bed. I am very emotionally drained from today's events, and I am going to guess even more by tomorrow's events. My drifting thought as I fall asleep is that I hope the Leaf cooperates with us. There is just too much weighing on this.

"Done." Gaara signs his name at the bottom of the letter.

He pushes the letter my way. Indicating for me to sign it. I do, though I don't know why I am signing. As of right now, my name doesn't really have any significance. Gaara and I make our way up to the messenger room. There is an arrangement of different birds, they are all beautiful, and you can see each with a little name tag attached to the string around their neck. I wait at the door entrance, letting Gaara head through to the right bird. It's a type of owl. I am trying to understand how an owl can be the fastest bird compared to a small one. As if reading my mind, Gaara says, "the owl can hold the weight of a larger letter better."

"Oh, ok. That makes sense." The conversation is a little awkward because these are the first words he has uttered that aren't rude, "why isn't Bob here?"

He shrugs his shoulders, concentrating on securing the letter. Running my hands through my hair, I am just so confused. Gaara has been on and off all day. He has been mean, quiet, and given me more attitude than I can handle. Then I catch him looking at me with something. I know I am confused about something else, but the look in his eyes seems so soft. And Temari stayed over so late, so I am just running off delusions now. And the rushing anxiety of-

"Hello?" Gaara raised an eyebrow at me, "Y/n?"

"Huh? What was that, sorry?" I shake my head.

Stop y/n. You are spiralling, and spiralling does nothing.

"You can leave now. I will assume the Leaf will accept our request to travel and discuss. So pack a bag and get some rest." Gaara walks from the room.

"Huh?" Once again left confused, "God... why am I in shambles right now? Why is this all so pressing and confusing? I wish I never feel love for a person like this again!"

I let out a frustrated rant and stared at the birds all staring back at me. They are all looking very judgemental. They are definitely smart enough to understand what I am saying. So I am glad they cannot speak and reshare what they heard. I am so happy no one listened to that moment of weakness.

~ Gaara's POV ~

Returning the excess supplies that were not used, I hear Y/n raised voice. Along with every last word she said. Love? Never feel it for someone again?

Leaning my weight against the open drawer. Gripping so harshly that my knuckles turn white. I am doing this to protect myself and partially her. I know she doesn't need it. But I don't need the added stress either. It'll work out better this way for both of us. Even though it'll sting and drive me up a fucking wall seeing her. Being near her and accidentally touching her. I am marrying this other girl, the so-called princess, because of security and extra money. The village will look up to me more and trust in my decision if a woman is by my side, even if she is just there for show. Y/n stepping in for me helped push the council and elders with the idea of me needing to marry Luna. As for the money, it will also give me a higher level over other leaders and their villages. And we may require that, especially with the direction of these villainous groups.

So I can't let this shit fuck me over. I need to push these feelings aside because I know they will disappear. I didn't make it into this position because I was caring for the emotions and opinions of others. I did it in my own way. That's why people fear me. I need to remain vigilant.

"Y/n does not affect me," I mutter under my breath, hearing the light footsteps of a woman.

"Sir Kazekage..." Her hands run up my back and shoulders, "are you ready for me?"

~ Y/n's POV ~

Packing brings back memories of when I was a ninja and unpacking all of my things. This reminds me that even though I can't use potions and items, I can create others. Give me something to do.

And suddenly, it is the early hours of the night. Light tapping pulls my concentration away from the different herbs and chemicals in front of me.

It's one of those damn birds with a small note from the neck.

"Thank you!" I untie it and pet its little head.

Gone before I could open the letter. The Leaf couldn't have responded so quickly. Scanning over it, I read:

Y/n,

We have just received a separate, more urgent letter from The Leaf.

We will travel at dawn. I'll explain the details in the morning.

Temari and Kankuro have been informed already.

Once you have read this, sleep.

G

With a shaky hand, I fold close the letter. The code. It's the code we developed as children. A single letter means there isn't time for games. I know this isn't fake or a trick. We have only ever used this twice. Meaning whatever this is urgent.

Needed to get more sleep. Arise before dawn. Reach the outskirts of the town. Complete a handover. Start travelling.

"This doesn't make any sense."