through the sand, for you. (gaara x reader)

chapter thirty

A soft knock at my door grabs my attention. Trying to swallow my food, I make a sound representing the words "hold on". Throwing open the front door to my hotel room, I am face to face with Yuki. The one from the office looks a lot different when she is in casual clothes.

"Oh. Yuki, hi!" I greet the girl with a lopsided smile, "come in."

"Hi y/n. I am just checking up on you." She says sweetly.

"I am all good! There is no need to check on me." I assure her.

"Yeah, you abruptly left for a break, and Mr Kazekage suddenly turned back up even though he is clearly unwell." She raises her eyebrows at me and enters the hotel room.

Flinching at the mention of Gaara, I take a deep breath.

"I am just taking a break. Catching up on myself. 'Mr Kazekage' is strong enough to care for himself." I shut the door behind her and returned to the couch to finish my food.

"No, no. I am not saying he isn't strong enough. I-" She fumbles through her words.

"Don't worry, Yuki. I am messing with you. Though, really is that all you came here for? Just to check up on me?" I question her. I can sense that she has something on her mind that clearly regards me, or else she wouldn't be here.

"No. Really that is all." She is fidgeting with her fingers.

"Ook?" I shake my head and turn to face her, "you really aren't convincing me. What do you want?"

"Nothing, I am just confused, that is all."

"There is nothing to be confused about. I am just taking a break. I don't know why she wants to know all this because it is none of her business. Gaara told me he did not need my help or didn't want it. So I am enjoying some alone time, so there isn't much to do."

"But don't you live with the sand siblings?"

"I used to. I have saved up some money so I will get my own place. Starting afresh." I say, sitting up.

"Ohh, ok, that makes sense. I just thought something may have happened between you guys." Yuki finally seems convinced.

"Nope. Everything is all good. There is no need to worry." I smile at her with a fake smile because I know I am lying to her. That is a massive lie. I have no idea where I stand with them, but I know I hate Gaara again.

"Alright, I am glad. I will let you be and if you need help finding a place, let me know. I think a few rooms are opening up in the building down the road from me."

"Actually! That's good to know. I'll probably start looking there."

I show Yuki out, looking at the mess in my hotel room. To be honest, I was having trouble finding a place because everything advertised is close to Tee's house. Probably because it is the farthest place from where the Akatsuki's explosion hit. I also haven't necessarily left the room since I checked in two nights ago. As well as speaking to no one other than Yuki just then. Am I drowning in my own self-pity... probably? But do I have any energy to do something to change that... no. I just don't know what to do. Thinking back on it, my outburst in the hospital room was kind of embarrassing. I basically made a public service announcement that Gaara and I slept together. I am sure that I have come to the conclusion that I have somehow developed unnecessarily attached to the redhead. He was so lovely to me, and all of a sudden, this shit happened.

Burying my head in my hands, I don't know what to do or where to go. I can start with a new place, but that'll be busy. Eventually, I have to go back to work, and that is with Gaara. Unless he fires me. I don't want to be fired. Maybe I could quit instead and go do some travelling. Running away is very dangerous, especially in my position, as I am still being tracked down by the Akatsuki. Well, not tracked down because they know exactly where I am. Hunted is probably the better word. But I also do not want to be around Gaara.

I don't want to because I will have to be around him. Meaning that sooner or later, I will end up at the conclusion that... I. Nope.

Far out, I just have been overthinking and wasting my time. "Alright, Y/n, let's get off our sorry ass and do something."

A few days later

"I am exhausted."

Temari's laugh fills the air, "that is because you decided to move into a new place on a whim."

"Yes, I am fully aware. I still think it was an excellent and smart idea." I respond, spreading my body across the empty floor of my open living area.

The new place I got is in the building Yuki mentioned to me. It is cheap and friendly, maybe a little small but I don't need much. Temari ended up tracking me down and was waiting for me to leave the hotel room I was in. She tried many times to convince me to come back and live with her, but I knew in my heart that it wouldn't be a good idea. I know it upsets Temari and things between us are a little weird, but I cannot deal with Gaara.

"Are you sure you don't want to come back?" She looks sad.

I sit up from the ground, "yes, I am sure. It wouldn't be a good idea."

"But why?" Her tone has an underlying style of betrayal.

"Because Temari, I am pretty sure I am in love with you, brother. The same brother discarded me and is about to get married to the Princess. Someone he told me he despised, that he promised he would stop the council from forcing him to marry her. But Nah, he just fucked me before he committed to the Princess. A notch in his belt." I feel my hands trembling, "unlike you, I wasn't lucky enough to be handed someone like Shikamaru. I love you, Temari, but this isn't about you. I am sorry this isn't going how you planned."

"You don't know that he did that!" Temari raises her voice.

"It doesn't matter what he did because it is done now. As he is getting married in three months. I am drawing a line and keeping it professional with Gaara."

I watch her storm out, slamming the door. This always happens when we get into disagreements. We are two strong personalities who put heads. There is nothing I can do, though. I am standing by points and promises. This also means returning to work tomorrow, as I told her I would. Organising the rest of my stuff, I try to clear my mind. We don't mean harm by it. It is just who we are. I think she has got it in her head that her brother and I will get along and end up together. I don't know why. But it is probably to do with the family. I don't know much about their family background because they are tight-lipped about it, but I know it is complicated. And I know Temari misses it and craves some sort of connection.

All in all, shit is complicated.

Authors note

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This is a lowkey filler chapter, so my apologies if it is slightly dull... but I need yall to realise you are in love with Gaara, for story purposes ;)

And again, HOLY SHIT, THANK YOU FOR THE SUPPORT.

It will be getting interesting again soon. And don't forget to comment and vote <3 (mainly comment because I find the stuff yall have to say hilarious)