The great regression

One

Ben sat in the doctor's office chair thinking that this was a bad decision.  While he needed to see the doctor due to an infected wound on his leg from work, he had decided to wear a diaper today for a little extra excitement and was now getting more and more worried as he sat waiting.  The doctor's office was running late and Ben had been waiting for 45 minutes already plus the toilet at the doctors was out of order, so after the juice with breakfast and morning coffee Ben's bladder was starting to ache badly.  Just as he was contemplating making another appointment and going home to use the toilet his name rang out of the speaker system telling him to proceed to the doctor's office, as Ben stood up a squirt of pee escaped into his diaper and his bladder started to ache even more as Ben clamped down to stop the flow.

Ben entered the doctor's office and the smart looking lady sitting at the desk motioned for him to sit on the bed for her to examine him.  She asked him to confirm that he was visiting her due to an infected wound and asked where it was.  Ben motioned to the inside of his calf on his right leg and the doctor asked him to roll up his jeans so that she could have a look.  Ben rolled up his jean leg and only just managed to get it up due to the close fit, the doctor examined it and told Ben that it was infected and she would be writing him a prescription for antibiotics but would also dress the wound, she then asked him to remove his jeans so that she could properly access the wound to apply the dressing.  Ben went suddenly very hot and started to sweat, the nerves pushed his bladder over the edge and another squirt went into his diaper, followed by a stream and then torrent as his bladder emptied.  The doctor simply stood staring at Ben waiting for him to remove his jeans, very hesitantly Ben undid his jeans and pulled them down revealing his diaper.  "Oh" exclaimed the doctor, "I didn't realise you had continence issues" as she saw the obviously wet yellow colouring showing through the diaper and she quickly turned back to her desk with his records and said "your records do not have anything in them about your incontinence, is it new?"  Ben was like a deer in car headlights with his mind racing to catch up, he then chose the only course of action that seemed reasonable and started telling the doctor how he had always had some issues, but it had gotten worse so he had taken to using diapers for protection.  Ben thought that with his explanation the doctor would let it drop, however while dressing the wound on his leg the doctor informed Ben that there was a urologist service attending the surgery that day and they had a few appointment slots available, once she finished his wound dressing she went back to her desk and started typing in her computer before saying "great, they have an appointment available in a few minutes, however I must ask one more question your records indicate that you have irritable bowel syndrome otherwise known as IBS, do you have any incontinence from your bowels as well?"  Ben was still too shocked and simply mumbled out that he sometimes had bowel issues even though he didn't as that seemed the right answer at the time.  The doctor nodded and typed in some more data before telling Ben he could put his jeans back on and wait in the waiting area again.

Ben sat again in the waiting area, only now he didn't need to pee but instead could almost constantly feel the squish of his diaper when he moved on his seat.  Then he heard his name again over the speaker system telling him to go to appointment room 2, so he got up and while walking to the room realised that his bladder was not fully empty and his nerves were starting to make him need another pee, so holding it in he went into the appointment room.  The urologist was another female doctor who had a warm and friendly smile, almost like someone who knows that you don't want to talk about something so need to be completely at ease.  She asked Ben to sit in the chair provided and proceeded to go through an intense series of questions about his bladder habits and leakages, all the time making notes on her computer.  Once finished she asked Ben to strip off to his underwear and climb onto the paper covered bed.  Once on the bed in only his diaper and socks the doctor proceeded to perform and ultrasound of Ben's bladder, she then told him that she would need him to remove his diaper so that she could perform an inspection of his prostate through his rectum.  Scared witless Ben removed his diaper and lay on his side as instructed while the doctor put the finger of one gloved hand up into his anus to feel his prostate.  The added pressure as well as his nerves meant that a small squirt of pee escaped and ran down onto the bed, as the doctor removed her finger and started cleaning up she noticed the wet patch and Bens obvious horror and said "don't worry, it happens.  Put your diaper back on".  Once Ben was fully dressed (back in his wet squelchy diaper) the doctor told him that she could not find an obvious condition which thankfully ruled out things like cancer, but due to his question responses and the fact that she had witnessed his incontinence she was diagnosing him with mixed incontinence from over active bladder (OAB) and weak pelvic floor muscles, so she would be prescribing him with medication to help with the OAB and an exorcize routine to help with the pelvic muscles.  Ben sat routed to the chair as the doctor went through his medication and exorcize requirements in detail.  Once the doctor had finished Ben stood up to leave saying his thank-you in the process when the doctor asked him to wait while she checked something, a smile graced her face as she said "great news, the continence nurse visits on the same day as me and they have a vacant slot in 20 minutes, can you wait?"  Ben didn't know what to do but thought that if he simply said no and left it would look a little too suspicious so he told the doctor that he could wait and she quickly booked him into the appointment slot.

Once again Ben sat in the doctors waiting area, now his bladder was aching as much as before his original doctor's appointment.  While thinking about the next nightmare appointment and getting worried his bladder released another squirt, Ben clamped down as hard as he could as he was not sure how much more the diaper could hold.  The speaker system announced Ben's name and told him to go to appointment room 6, Ben started walking to the appointment room and with his nerves stretched worse than they had been at any other time in his life his bladder started to release a squirt with each step before it felt like every muscle in his bladder and urinary tract all just disappeared as they relaxed together and emptied into his diaper just as he was opening the appointment room door.  Ben stood there in shock for two reasons, firstly he had completely wet his diaper for the second time today without wanting to, and secondly because he knew the young nurse in front of him, she was called Stacey and was close friends with his girlfriend Becky.  Stacey said Hi as if thinking that he had wondered into the wrong room then looked down and said "oh, let's get you on the table and cleaned up before we continue", that seemed a little strange to Ben until he felt the cold wet on the inside of his jeans and knew that his diaper had not held all of the pee and the inside of his legs were showing signs of a bladder accident.  Ben slowly walked over to the bed and while waiting for Stacey to put a fresh layer of paper plus an incontinence sheet (large absorbent square pad) on the bed he felt his morning coffee make his bowels start to play up as he had been at the doctors all morning and not been for his usual toilet visit, Ben was absolutely certain that he was not going to have a number two accident but as he had that thought his bowel clenched and Ben felt all of his anxiety and stress focus on his bowel muscles forcing them to relax and the poo start to make its way out.  Ben clamped down really hard and managed to stop the accident before it happened and instead he just felt a strange shudder move down through his bowels and out his anus, almost like a thick wet rippling fart, then Stacey motioned for him to get on the bed after he had removed his jeans.  While Ben was getting undressed and onto the bed Stacey was reading the notes on her computer from the two previous doctors, she then turned and repeated many of the questions the previous doctors had asked but went into more detail about how often his accidents were and how much, she also discussed his 'bowel incontinence' in far more detail, though Ben repeatedly told her that it was very rare for him to have a bowel accident hoping that she would forget about it.  Once the questions were finished Stacey told Ben that she would be prescribing him incontinence products that he would not have to pay for and that would be delivered once a month, she pulled out a few boxes from under the bed and after moving a few things around that Ben could not see she opened one of the boxes and pulled out an adult diaper far thicker than the ones Ben usually wore for recreation.  "I know that you have been coping in your own way so far" said Stacey, "but with the levels of wetting you have described and with bowel incontinence too you really need a more substantial product like this".  Ben was too scared to say anything so simply nodded, Stacey went on to talk about the benefits he would find with the thicker product but that it would unfortunately be a little more noticeable, and she asked if that would be OK, again Ben simply nodded wanting her to finish so that he could go.  Stacey wrote down a few things and then told Ben that she was going to remove and change his diaper so that he could see how to fit it better as the one he had one was not quite right.  Ben was rooted to the bed in shock over what was about to happen when Stacey undid the tapes on his diaper and pulled down the front, ben caught a whiff of urine but also of poo, he thought that when he almost messed himself he must have farted into his diaper.  As Stacey grabbed a packed of wipes and began wiping down Ben she told him that she thought his bowel incontinence was worse than he had been letting on and that he shouldn't be ashamed of it, Ben thought that was strange until he saw one of the used wipes that Stacey was folding and putting onto the pee soaked front of his diaper, the wipe was covered in poo.  Oh no thought Ben, I must have messed myself a bit even though I have been holding it all this time, as his shame and embarrassment reached a crescendo a little more pee dribbled out which Stacey quickly noticed and wiped up.  Once Ben was clean Stacey removed the dirty diaper, efficiently folded it, put it into a small bag which she tied and then dropped into a hazardous waste bin, she then proceeded to raise Bens legs to put the new bulky diaper under him, bring up the front encasing him within and then expertly taping him up very snugly, all of the time she was telling Ben what she was doing and how to make sure that the diaper fit properly.

Ben was sitting in the chair again facing Stacey while she typed up her notes on the appointment, he was wearing a pair of hospital scrubs (trousers) over his diaper, Stacey had found the scrubs in another room and brought them back for him, his wet jeans were in a carrier bag for him to take home and wash like a toddler at pre-school.  When she had finished typing up Stacey told Ben that his first delivery of diapers would be in a couple of days and that he would also receive other supplies such as wipes, diaper bags etc..  Stacey also handed a fairly large box to Ben and said that it contained 4 days' worth of diaper sand other supplies to last him until his main delivery arrived, and then he would get a delivery every month.  Ben peered down into the box and saw a large plastic wrapped package with 'adult premium briefs' stamped all over with pictures of an open diaper, Ben couldn't see what other supplies were underneath but he noticed that the package of diapers was a pack of 20 so he asked Stacey if there was a mistake.  She told him that with his level of incontinence and that it is both bladder and bowel, five diapers each day is what was expected, even with the thicker more absorbent ones that he would be wearing from now on.  Stacey then placed a white paper bag on the table next to Ben and informed him that while she was searching for the scrubs she spoke with his doctor and had some changes to his prescribed medication, Ben was a little concerned and Stacey had a funny look on her face as she told him.  She said was concerned that his nerves and stress due to his condition would make things worse, so he now had two injections to be given which she would deliver and they would last one month each, one was to relax his bowel so that when he needed the toilet he could go and not get constipated which she thought was part of his bowel problem, the other medication was to help him sleep at night so that his mind and bladder had a rest from the constant need to 'hold-in'.  Stacey also gave Ben a CD to play, she said it contained self-help tips and encouraging stories about other people in his condition and that he should just listen to it when relaxing.  Ben didn't know what to say as Stacey prepared the two needs and gave Ben his injections, one in each arm.  Just as he was preparing to leave Stacey asked Ben if his girlfriend Becky knew of his problems, he told her that she didn't know and Stacey tried to talk him into sharing his issues with her so that she could help him through it, she also said that if Becky knew then Stacey could openly discuss it at their home when she visits and provide additional support.  Ben said that he would think about it and let her know if and when he told Becky.

Ben sat in his car outside the doctors with his mind reeling from the incredible morning he had, he started up his car, popped the CD Stacey had given him in the CD player, hit play and began driving home.  On the way he stopped listening to the CD but let it play in the background and started to think about how he could reasonably come up with a way to get out of this in the near future, perhaps some miracle recovery that he could explain to the doctors.  Just then his bowels gave a rumbling and terrible cramp and Ben remembered that he still hadn't finish the poo that he most obviously started in the doctor's office, as he turned the next corner Ben tummy rumbled again followed by a strange sensation under his bowel and around his anus, which turned into a feeling of something pressing against the outside of his bum, as the feeling increased Ben realised that he was messing himself with no control at all, he tried to stop it but couldn't and as his diaper filled the smell in the car became unbearable and Ben had to drive along with the window down.  When he got back to his apartment Ben carried the box Stacey the incontinence nurse had given him up to his apartment constantly very nervous that someone would see him and ask what he had, or why he smelled like he had messed himself.  But nobody saw him or said anything and he made it back into his apartment.  He looked at the small package of adult diapers that made up his own small supply for when he was feeling adventurous, then  with a little hesitation at first he quickly opened the box and emptied out the contents, there was the pack of 20 very thick adult diapers, two packets of baby wipes complete with baby logo, a pot of barrier crème which was obviously meant to be applied to his diaper area in order to avoid diaper rash, and finally there was a short note from Stacey that read "Dear Ben, I know that this is difficult for you, but if you ever need to talk about it as a friend or need any advice please call me.  Additionally if you need any support with your diapers I am happy to help, Stacey".  Well that's not going to happen though Ben as he usually only wore one diaper and when he was finished he would take it off and not put on another, however he had just messed himself and was wondering what was going on, two bladder accidents and two bowel accidents in the same day.  So Ben opened the package of diapers and took one out, then with diaper, wipes and barrier crème Ben went into the bathroom to perform his first ever really 'needed' diaper change.