Ardent | Elijah Mikaelson

Chapter 13

Elijah wouldn't stop pacing.

"For fuck's sake," said Evangeliya, glaring at him as he dared to make a twentieth lap around the private jet. "Can you stop?"

He raised a brow. "I was unaware you were bothered by natural habits."

"You're anxious. Have a drink, take the edge off. Or talk about it. Don't pace back and forth as if you're not losing your shit. It's okay to not be okay, you know? You can't keep pretending things don't bother you or that you've got everything together. Makes it that much worse when it all falls apart."

The flight attendant seemed to agree with her, smiling slightly as she brought Evangeliya another glass of whiskey. Evangeliya invited her to sit down, looking into her eyes, "You won't feel pain. Just relax." When the flight attendant was calm, she bit into her throat.

"Evangeliya," said Elijah sternly, ceasing his pacing at once.

"What?" said Evangeliya, pulling away, blood dripping down to her bottom lip. "It's not hurting her. If we're going to fight Alaric, I need to be strong."

He seemed intent on hiding the fact that it bothered him. Tempted him. "I prefer those who work for my family not be harmed in any way."

"You want to feed."

"I do not need to."

"But you should. And you want to. Why do you deny your urges."

"You are being disrespectful."

"I know, I'm a brat, but something tells me you need to be exposed to brats more often. Come on, what is wrong with feeding? Take off the jacket, loosen up, strengthen yourself. Heal her afterward and it'll be okay. You're not losing control by feeding. You're practicing it, actually. You are a good vampire in your eyes, yes? So you don't take it too far, that's all. But you don't forget you are, at your core, a vampire. One who needs sustenance, who needs this to survive. It is in our nature. Denying it does us no good. Come on. If I'm going to be letting you try to talk me out of using anger all the time to fuel me, then you need to let me show you what it's like to let your guard down a little bit."

Hesitantly, he came over. "Here," said Evangeliya, guiding his hands. "You know how to feed, I'm sure. But this way–" she gestured to the woman's jugular vein, tilting her head then placing a napkin underneath, "you won't get dirty. Just go for it, a little bit, then stop. Simple."

He did as told, and immediately, she could see how he relaxed. She wondered when he'd last had a drink. He let himself feed for only a minute before he pulled away, placing the napkin over the wound. Evangeliya bit into her wrist, allowing the woman to heal, then laying her down. "There, sweetheart, get some rest. Thank you. Sleep."

She closed her eyes obediently, and Evangeliya finished cleaning her up once the bites were gone. "You have a savior complex of sorts," she noted as she gently removed the stains from her skin. "You think you need to be pristine, a white knight, that you need to protect others. So you restrict yourself, you believe you can't save everyone if you're not meticulous and restrained. But you can be in tune with the beast within you without letting him get control. Still being a hero. It's okay to get dirty. It's okay to be respectful. It's encouraged. But you act like you're on a different level than your siblings. Like you're not the same as them, deep down. Klaus told me many things about when you all first turned. Lucien and Tristan told me many things. You've done a lot of wrong, and Aurora de Martel happens to feel strongly about that. It can't be undone. But you can learn from it. You don't do it again if you don't want to, if you know you shouldn't. What you don't do is pretend it didn't happen. Accepting those parts of yourself is better than shoving them away. It always comes back to bite you in the ass."