In the dark of the night

Chapter 42

Jerry drives me to the airport and my mothers words keep ringing through my ears.

"You'll have to come home"

I mean really home? What dose home even mean to me anymore, dose it mean Florida with mom and dad, Nate and all my childhood friends? Then again it's also where dad died and where my entire school turned against me once I had a meltdown in the hallway because I kept seeing dads face. So is home anchorage that I spent a year in, the place where I was tortured and where I lost so many people. It was also where I formed a bond with Nan and where I found out what I was, the place where I learned to love so many people. Or is my Home New York, I've been here almost eleven years, I have a job, an apartment, a boyfriend and some acquaintances. New York is tied to no bad memories other than the fight I had with Simon all those years ago.

Jerry starts to flip through the music stations,

The flame by cheap trick plays,

Immediately I leap up and change the song,

"What's your problem I like that song."

"Well I don't, I hate it actually!" That's a lie, but sometimes a lie is easier to tell then a truth.

"Whatever" he rolls his eyes,

"We're almost there, thanks for dropping me off." I say,

"You know I could always go with you" Jerry smiles,

I shake my head, "I want this to be a quick in and out type of thing and if you go my mother will never ever let us leave."

"Fine if that's what you want"

I can tell he's annoyed, but I just can't bring Jerry to Anchorage, I just can't.

We ride the rest of the way in awkward silence and when he pulls up to the airport I get out of the car.

"Thanks again Jerry,"

"What no kiss?" He leans my way,

I lean towards him and give him a goodbye kiss,

I rush through the airport, quickly I board my plane,

Breathing in once I sit down, this will be simple I'll be in and out, there's nothing to it.

My plane ride is torment, it's God awful to ride a plane that long and be unable to close your eyes for even a moment.

I can't risk falling asleep and having a vision,

~

When the plane lands my eyes are crossing I'm that tired.

As I exit the airport I'm shuttering as the cool air hits my skin, Anchorage is a four hour bus ride away.

Sitting myself down into my bus seat I look out the window and try with everything in me not to fall asleep.

By hour two I lose the ability to fight off sleep,

"We should go" Toria speaks, she stands in a kitchen, she wears a tight dress that reveals a baby bump.

"Why would we go?" Mark enters the kitchen,

They both look aged,

"For Nat" she speaks up,

"The same Nat who left us all behind? Who's to say she will even go, it's not like she hasn't missed a funeral before."

"Mark come on, now you know bloody well she was hurting."

"We all were!" He yells,

With a flash I'm brought to another moment,