Silence.
Screaming so loud inside.
But,
I haven't let myself scream
In six years.
Haven't let myself cry
In six years.
And I most definitely
Haven't let myself
Sob in six years.
I just scream silently into
My pillow.
Forcing the air out,
But it makes no sound.
Tears build up in my eyes,
And they catch on my eyelashes
Everytime I blink,
But I won't let them fall.
And I choke.
Because I can't sob.
I won't let them see I'm in pain.
Even if it means I can't breath.
The blade,
Unscrewed from a pencil
Sharpener,
Rests in a silver case.
Velvet lining.
Right on my desk.
Not touched
For months.
But it is
Oh so
God damn
Tempting.
