Chapter Thirteen

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Please forgive the cringe. I was young :/

I waited by the front desk whilst Tyler finished his phone call with Jake, arranging the day. I looked through the glass front to the building. Gazing out at the streets of London. The road busy with pedestrians. Walking 'to and fro' with laptop bags, piles of paper all going in different directions. It was 12:30pm and lunch break for everybody at work. A woman walked her Daschund down the pavement and a man strode on past with a baby in a backpack type bag, strapped to his front.
Tyler joined me at the desk and took my hand, "Ready?", he asked as we both faced the doors. "Ready", I answered him and he led me outside. We stood in the middle of the road, no cars came and he stood still, facing me as he bent down to kiss me. It was as if he was sending a message to the public, "this is my girl and I don't care what you think".
I took Tyler to St. Paul's, he'd been to London before but he'd never been up St. Paul's. In my opinion the cathedral was one of the most magnificent buildings in the city; hundreds of years old and architecturally stunning. We walked around the balcony at the top, I pulled him along as he peered over the edge. Then finding a place where no tourist had got to yet, there I turned and kissed him on top of the world. The whole of London below us. Everywhere we went, every building we climbed, every park we walked we vowed to kiss in the middle of it and at the top of it. This way we knew we would be sending a clear message. we didn't care what effect it had on us. I'd decided that fame wouldn't bother me as long as I had Tyler. He made me strong. He made me feel as though nothing mattered. The best feeling. For Tyler, he felt the same, as long as we had each other - nothing, not even millions of angry people, could get between us. Our love, this love was strength. Jake had described our day as a 'suicide mission', there was a fifty-fifty chance that the public would not like what we'd done and therefore Tyler's reputation would be placed in jeopardy. Jake respected what Tyler was doing though, risking everything for the girl he loved; he'd said it was "inspirational".
Both Tyler and I agreed we didn't want to eat in a restaurant that night, neither one of us enjoyed eating in smart places, it made me feel uncomfortable; like I had to put a mask on and it seemed he felt the same. I'd always hated the pretentious atmosphere in all restaurants all around the country. Tiny portions, too caught up in the presentation and couples on dates; trying to impress each other with their choice of location, indicating to the size of their wallets. As if money is all that mattered. Besides where's the fun in sitting down in a smart restaurant.
Tyler found a lit up stand, along with others on the side of the pavement. Londoners weaved between stalls and set ups, shows and demonstrations and they sat on benches, eating waffles or pizza. He'd found a cute looking Chinese stall. The man spoke little English and presented us with a small paper box with hot food inside. We gave him some money in exchange but he gave most of it back. Surprising - surely he would have been happier to charge more, like the other stalls. But he just smiled and spoke back to us in Cantonese. Sitting now, I laughed at Tyler's vague attempt at the kind man's language. He sounded so funny and it made me crack up. He laughed at my laugh and there we sat like a couple of seagulls, squawking at everything we saw. I laughed so vigorously that I made my wound bleed. I then laughed at that because it looked so scary to passers by. Tyler at first was slightly concerned as he lifted up my top just a little to see. After he saw that I found it quite so amusing, he picked up again. We joked about how odd it must look; as though I'd just been shot. It was hilarious.
The time was 21:55, we sat opposite the river below Big Ben. Watching the lights flickering in the water like a million blinking eyes. The sky was completely clouded over, only a faint glow of the moon was visible above us. Not quite perfect, but when was anything - ever? It was perfect for us, in that moment, it was flawless. The background noise dulled like the volume switch on a radio and the people around us paused as if it was magic. There we sat on our little concrete bench in front of the beauty that was London. My head rested peacefully on his shoulder and his head lay on mine. Tyler spoke, his voice soft and almost silent, "Amelia", he waited for me to give him a sign, "Did I mention that I love you?", he stared out over the water as I gazed up at him, I spoke back - quietly. "Tyler", I paused momentarily, "Did I mention that I love you too". He bent his head ever so slightly to look down at me. He lifted his hand and held my head with it, moving it towards him slowly. He shut his eyes and wrinkled his forehead a bit, we kissed. It was a kiss longer than before. We continued to kiss, over and over. His hand sliding behind my head, his strong fingers grasping at my hair and releasing it again. Our heads met in the middle as we stopped before kissing again.
I stayed with Tyler again that night, sleeping with him, next to his warm body. The next thing I knew, I was gasping for air - the sheets at the end of the bed. I was drenched in sweat. I was so hot and scared and yet freezing at the same time. It was pitch black and I was sitting up in bed. Tyler came running out of the bathroom with a wet flannel; he pushed it against my head and placed a pillow behind me for me to lean back on. "'Melia talk to me. You're okay now. I'm here with you, no one's 'gonna hurt you, okay?", his voice was low and serious. "Ty-", I breathed in hard, it was as if someone was holding my windpipe - preventing me from taking in any air. He kissed my forehead, the grip I felt around my neck loosened slightly. "Tyler, he was here. He was here again. He won't go away, everywhere I go; he won't leave me be. And I...I- I couldn't speak and I couldn't move and he stabbed me with the bottle and I-", I burst into tears. I'd run out of air completely. I felt like I was drowning or being suffocated. Tyler could see what was happening. As I struggled, panic grew in his face. He leant forward as he kneeled beside my end of the bed. He closed his eyes as he pressed his lips against mine and held them there for a while. He drew back and lifted his head up. I took a breath in. His kiss gave me breath, it gave me strength. "Nothing, nothing will ever come between my love for you, do you understand?". He was stern, I spoke finally "You're so sexy when you're being authoritative", I smiled and breathed in and out again. "I'm serious", he said again, I whispered now, "I know", I reached out and stroked the side of his face with my knuckles. He took my hand and squeezed it tightly, "I love you. So much", he kissed my knuckles. "And I you", I smiled. He made me feel so safe as if I was under his protection but so ruthless at the same time, not in a vulnerable way though.
He came to lie next to me again. Facing each other in the centre of the bed, I smiled and he smiled back. He traced the skyline of my face with his forefinger as I'd done to him before. Dragging my bottom lip downwards. He then moved closer in towards me and kissed me several times. Then he whispered, "Can I touch you?", he was obviously conscious that being touched right now might make me feel threatened. I loved how patient and how attentive Tyler was, in this situation he didn't want to overstep his boundaries. "You may", I replied, smiling. There was nothing that could drive Tyler away from me. If anything, feeling his touch on my skin was what I wanted most right now. He glided his palm over my body. Dipping in and out as I lay on my side. His touch was firm and rough and yet soft. He rolled me over onto my back as he moved in sync with me, above me. He kissed my neck, I pulled my t-shirt over my head, the air and Tyler pooled in over me. I pushed him over as I rolled on top of him. Sitting upright, my legs bent either side of him. I had nothing to tie my hair back with so I pushed it all onto to one side, covering my bare shoulder and almost down to my elbow. I leant down to meet Tyler's face and I kissed his lips, his jaw, his neck and his shoulder over and over. He kissed me back. His broad hands spread over my back, pulling me parallel to him. Our bodies warmed each other, my skin pressing softly against his. We were gentle, moving slowly as we made love to one another.

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