Close The Door

Chapter 17- Those Three Words

"Good morning, love," Ash whispered. I opened my eyes to see that I was no longer laying on his chest. I let out a small smile, and it felt like I haven't smiled in forever. "Morning Ash," I said.

He stretches, and as if I were a mirror, I did too. The first time I've properly slept in a while, and I'm so grateful that Ash was able to bring it out of me. He sits up, looking at me, while I stare back at him. I let another smile. Something about him brought it out of me, more so now than before. "What?" I say jokingly. He laughs to himself, staring at me with the largest grin imaginable. "Nothing."

I get up, and make my way towards the case of water bottles on the floor in the kitchen. I grab two, and head back to a lazy Ash, who is on his phone covered up. I hand him the water, and he accepts.

"How did you sleep?" I asked. He takes a small sip, and closes the bottle, before looking at me. "I slept comfortably knowing someone was next to me," he says, a small blush forming across his face. I look away, flashing a sheepish grin. Part of me wanted to kiss him right there, but first I had some things to take care of.

I grab my bag and walk to my desk, putting in my laptop and books in. Ash looks at me confused, wondering what the sudden decision was for. I zip up the bag, and grab his hoodie that was on my chair and flung it to his face. He flinched. "We're going to the library. I have a lot of catching up to do," I say. He shakes his head, not like he was saying no, but like he didn't hear me properly. I looked at him with a not-so-serious demeanor. "I have a lot of homework to catch up on that I want to get done," I clarified. He stood up, as if he still didn't understand me, but put his hoodie on. I grabbed mine from my dresser, and put it on. I grabbed my bag from the chair and the keys. Before we left, I grabbed his hand, squeezing it momentarily, before letting it go and walking out the door.

On our way to the lobby, we run into Misty. She waves at Ash before noticing I'm next to him. Her expression drops. "Goh, it's you," she says in both a shocked and depressed manner. I walk up to her, arms wide open, asking for permission to give her a hug. She accepts and I pull her in for a hug. "I'm so sorry that I wasn't there for you," I apologize. She gives me an apologetic look.

"I should be the one apologizing to you. Regardless, I'm so glad to see you Goh," she says. Slowly but surely, my heart felt like it was being repaired, piece by piece. But something still felt wrong. I should feel happy seeing her, but I don't. We talk just a little bit longer, before Ash and I resume our journey to the library and Misty to her room, wondering if speaking to me was a good idea or not.

The once gentle breeze from before became harsher as the weeks went by. The autumn wind in Galar was no joke. The trees were starting to die from the season, and their leaves scattered across the grass all over campus, which had remained green even to this day. As we walk towards the library, bits and pieces of Mallow creep their way into my mind. Her green hair standing out among the sea of orange-browns. The once confident Goh had become frozen in place, and Ash continued walking before he noticed I wasn't next to him.

"You okay Goh?" He asked, softness to his voice. I didn't nod, I didn't shake my head. I didn't do anything. I didn't know what I could do in the moment. He walks closer to me. "Goh?" He asked once again, quiet but more stern. I came back to my senses.

"It's nothing, I was just thinking about this first assignment I have to do," I said, laughing unconvincingly, and Ash took note but said nothing. We kept on walking to the library. The silence between us wasn't strong, but it felt like it did. Ash was giving me space, which I kind of appreciated, but I wish he would still at least try to talk to me.

The library was the only building on campus that I haven't had the time to properly look around in. The multitude of bookshelves, categorically organized and well-maintained, was enough to lose me for hours. What surprised me was how much bigger it looks from the inside. There was blue carpet and a list of floors. There are six floors here, with two of them being dedicated to bringing the traditional experience, meaning peace and quiet. The third floor was specifically tailored for group activities, as there were groups simply having study parties. I look at Ash, determining which floor we should go to, before making the decision. After taking the time, we both agree on going to the fifth floor; one of the quiet floors.