Meet me in the Emerald Forest

Chapter 29 Clementine

*Trigger Warning: retelling of sexual assault

I can't believe I'm about to do this, I can't believe I'm about to do this.

I kept repeating that one sentence to myself over and over again as I paced my room. I knew I had to do it now or I was going to chicken out, so I stormed across my room and ripped the door open with a renewed sense of determination.

I was shocked when I nearly tripped over Lukas sitting on the floor. When I finally got his attention and he came to the realization that I wanted him to come inside my room, nearly all of my resolve had vanished. But, something about that look on his face and the love I saw clearly in his eyes, gave me all the confidence in the world to go on.

"When I was twelve, I fell in love with a boy." I began, "I thought he was going to be my forever, my one true love. He was the most popular boy in school and came from money. You don't know much about my mother, but she was very worried about appearances. She wanted a cheerleading captain for a daughter, but got me, instead. I was all the things she wasn't and didn't want. So, she absolutely loved it when I landed the quarterback, she couldn't have been prouder. In fact, it was the only time she ever told me she was proud of me,

"Bennett and I dated all throughout high school. He made me feel like the only girl in the world, the only person who mattered. He never missed a chance to show me off and tell everyone that I was his. So, I thought it was normal when he would hit me or get so angry he blacked out from screaming. It was dumb things at first, like forgetting to wear his jersey on game days or for missing one of his practices for a study group. Then, it was all the time,

"He wanted me by his side 24/7, no matter what. I was missing study groups, debate team practice, student government, even some of my classes to skip school with him. My mother didn't care, honestly, she was more proud of me wearing his class ring than of my perfect GPA. But, the one thing I maintained was my innocence. I refused to give him my virginity, I wanted to wait until we were married. That pissed him off,

"Valentine's Day, our Junior year, he proposed to me under the school bleachers. Except, he said I had to tell everyone it was a promise ring and not to wear it on my left hand. He said everyone would freak out if we told them before we graduated. So, we made a plan to run away together to New York City when we turned 18 and graduated high school. Of course, he told me that since we were engaged now, I owed him sex. And, I did, I gave him my virginity that night,

"Over the summer, he got accepted into a football program hosted on a college campus in Texas. So did a few others from our school and some of the cheerleaders, too. Gianna, the captain of the squad, was invited. She had eyes for Bennett all throughout high school and hated me. Naturally, we were enemies. The rumors flew that she and Ben were hooking up at the summer camp. He swore up and down that he wasn't and, like the naive teenager I was, I believed him,

"Senior year started up and the rumors continued. Everyone in school told me that they were together, and, if I had eyes, I would have been able to see the evidence for myself. Instead, I ignored them and all the proof standing in front of me. I continued to follow him around like his puppet,

"That fall, I was studying late after school most nights, preparing for the first round of SATs. He was pissed because I was missing his football practices and parties. One Saturday night, he told me about a bonfire and said I had to come or it was proof that I no longer loved him. So, of course, I rushed home from school and changed into his favorite outfit. Oh, wasn't my mother so proud of me that night. I ran off to the bonfire, happy to be able to please him,

"It took me a few minutes to find him in the dark, but, once I did, it was clear as day what was going on. He was lit up by the fire, leaning against a tree, and making out with Gianna. I was devastated and so I ran. I ran through the forest and I ran right into a bunch of werewolves," I paused my story, sucking in air as I tried to calm myself. My hands, arms, feet, legs, and every inch of my body was shaking violently.