Temporary Kisses

Part 15

Asher's POV

I got onto my bike and rode down to Catelaya's house. How was she going to react to me now that she knows my biggest secret, now that she knows what I did...

I sigh loudly and parked my bike in her paved driveway and took a deep breath in to steady my nerves. I had to talk to her at some point and I guess today was that point. I can't go on with her thinking I murdered him in cold blood I-it wasn't like that.

I knock on the door hesitantly and I saw a small brown head of hair poke her small head through the crack in the doorway only to slam the door again as soon as she caught sight of me. I winced slightly to myself as I shoved my foot in the door as a make shift door stop to prevent her from shutting the door and making her talk to me. "Cat I-I have to expla-"

"Explain what Asher, that you're a murderer, that you pushed a guy out of a window in cold blood making him fall thirty feet to his death? What more would you like to explain my darling ex lover?" She asked bitter sweetly with a disgusting sneer painted on those beautiful lips that only yesterday I was kissing. I have to say all those words cut me deep like the knife of the man himself before he died. The word ex hurt most and I found myself visibly flinch as she spat those poisonous words at me. It was finalizing things and ending them before I had any time to even say a word. It was like convicting someone for life in prison after reading one article...it's not fair. "You know what? I came over today to explain myself and fix all this shit but there's no point in fixing it is there?" I whispered whilst looking down at the floor, my eyes blurring slightly.

"Oh, so now you're giving up on me? You coward!" She screamed at my face and slapped me violently causing my head to whip to the side violently. I lifted my hand to my lip tasting the metallicy flavour of blood. I spat the blood pooling in my mouth on the ground in the grass, and shook my head slightly at her. I give up. There's no point in talking to her and I can't be with someone who believes a sheet of paper over me before she's even let me talk. I felt tears blurring my eyes which I haven't shed for over five years now. I thought the tears had all dried up after what had happened to me, yet this girl was re-opening every single bone deep wound i've attempted to stitch and let heal.

I lifted my head suddenly and looked into the guilty eyes of Catelaya, who almost looked as though she had a slight change of heart. I turned to leave with a sad smile, only to have a small warm hard taking a hold of my wrist and tugging me back slightly. "Tell me your side of the story Asher...I'm sorry I-" She started in a regretful voice but I couldn't, she'd already proven she didn't trust me. I took in a deep breath before I said the words that would break me inside.

"It's too little too late minha gata...you don't trust me and that hurts more than anything my parents could have ever said to me and hurts more than this did...It's a shame I never had a chance to tell you about any of that but to be honest, now I'm glad I didn't" I said while lifting my shirt up slightly to reveal the huge ghostly scar winding from the bottom of my back all the way up my shoulder. She gasped slightly and reached out to touch me causing me to flinch back quickly and take a few steps away from her. Her hand fell limply back to her side as I stepped away.

"My heart was never whole to start with, and if It's possible...you've broken it even more than it was before. It hurts more than anything Cat, and you caused it...you made me feel this way." I whispered to her and turned to walk away back to my bike, regretting the cruel words I had let escape my mouth, but they were the truth. I straddled the seat, started the roaring engine and drove away...never looking back. I can't stay in this town anymore. I have never felt these emotions before, and that scares me. I need to leave her...this, I need to go back to my home.
I got to my small house that I shared with Nolan and Xander and my composure cracked. I had lost everything all because of a stupid piece of fucking paper she read and believed over me. The only girl i've ever loved like that and I fucked it up...she fucked it up as soon as she decided to snoop into my fucking life without asking me. It wounded me deep that she couldn't trust me enough to ask me or just not fucking snoop to begin with, that she chose to side against me. The tears started to fall. Down my cheeks, down my neck and dropping onto the paved floor for the first time in years. My composure finally melted down into nothing like a burnt out candle and soon became non-existent as my face contorted with sadness and grief and I fell to my knees on the floor sobbing deeply. I punched the floor, the wall, the door until my knuckles were dripping warm crimson liquid ,creating a bright red puddle around my knees. Seeing the puddle almost reminded me of what I did two years ago... My knuckles were tender and sore yet I carried on. I had to rid myself of this pain until I was numb and the only way to do that is...to go to where it all began... Brazil.

Catelaya's POV

It's too little too late...those words were ringing in my head as I stood on the doorstep still unmoving, he left me, after he promised me he never would.

Flashback~ I laughed happily as he wound a warm strong arm around my waist hugging me closer to his toned body vibrating with the soft sound of his laughter. His deep chuckle rang through my ears bringing warmth into my heart and brightness into my life like a ray of sunshine piercing the dark. I leaned up slightly and pressed my lips onto his and we kissed deeply and passionately. His hands played with a single strand of hair and we kissed tenderly. We both broke apart panting slightly whilst staring into eachothers eyes with bright goofy smiles plastered onto both of our faces like the love struck teenagers we were. I laid my head on his chest and snuggled into him humming slightly in satisfaction as we both stared up at the twinkling stars surrounding us. I looked up at the beautiful man beneath me and his angelic face. He's been through so much pain and anger yet I still don't know hardly anything about the suffering he has lived through. I'll never do anything to harm him. I traced the lines of one of his tattoos on his arms gently with a feather light touch. "A-Asher?" I whispered into his ear gently causing him to turn in my direction slightly to give me his full attention.

"Stay with me" I murmered whilst entwining both sets of our fingers together, interlocking our hands.

"Always" He replied softly and pressed an ghostly kiss to my temple.

I felt warm salty tears dribble down my face and before I knew it I was sobbing uncontrollably. I guess...what we had was just temporary kisses. Nothing is permanent, and when you feel as though your life is finally starting to take shape, and when you least expect it it's all snatched away from you in one fell swoop and before you know it, you're back right where you were before, with nothing, alone and unloved.

Very emotional chapter today guys and I'm so sorry but I feel as though my writing is sort of slipping standard wise. I'm so sorry but I'm thankful to those very few of you that have stuck around with me since the beginning :D It means a lot to me <3