Nostalgia: The Bucket List

one

Winter's POV

"Can't you really come over and help around? Even just for the night?"

"Mom, I can't afford to be late at work tomorrow. If it was earlier today, I would've come and get home by the time the kids sleep"

"Please? I'll make you your favorite meal for dinner"

I wouldn't have guessed a time would come where my mom would beg for me to go home out of the blue on a Sunday afternoon.

I had established it already in front of my family that I would appreciate it if they don't frequently call me to take over some responsibilities that I'm not supposed to be tending to.

"You don't have to, mom. I'll come. I might as well buy dinner that the kids would probably like right now"

I heard more crying from the other end of the line. Then I heard my big brother, trying to comfort his daughter with his voice shaking.

I couldn't help but sigh deeply. My mother might have heard that as I heard her open the door to the porch in order to hear me well.

"Thank you, your brother really needs you right now"

'Of course he does'

I hang up.

I dropped down my hand that was already thrusting the key to my front door and sighed for the nth time, turning around to walk towards my parked car.

As soon as I was buckled up my seat, I slumped my shoulders and whined as the feeling of getting so close to lying down on my bed faded away.

Wanting to get home as soon as I could - even though I was literally still outside my house - I turned on the car and drove to our parents' old house which my brother now shares with his freelancer best friend.

'Speaking of the devil'

I was already minutes away when rain started to pour. I further stepped on the pedal to speed up a bit and hopefully arrive before the downpour when I spotted June, my brother's best friend.

"Hey sweetheart, wanna ride?" I teasingly winked with an ugly and forced smirk. He couldn't help but grimace as he opened the door to the shotgun and hopped in with a bag of groceries.

"Ah shit. I forgot I was-"

"Your mom called you to come over?" I nodded.

"I bought something the kids would definitely like"

"Which I was supposed to buy yet I forgot. Thanks, June, you're a lifesaver"

"Unintentionally" He chuckled.

"Well, not really. It's been long past now that I would've said you know my brother's kids more than I do"

With the silence that came after that, I thought that maybe I shouldn't have said that. There was nothing bad about it, really, it's just that I've been miserable.

It's not like I told them I was, it's just that they knew. And I guess it wasn't the best timing to have brought that up.

And now my awkwardness has resulted to a silent ride.

'Just great...'

I pressed onto the horn of my car and my brother instantly opened the steel garage door by the time I did the second honk. With his big, muscular arms, he continued to push up the steel door with one hand like damn superman sending a lost spaceship back to Mars.

"He looks ridiculous" I muttered as I parked the car inside the garage. Noticing June's silence, I shut down the car and tapped his shoulder.

"Why was I called over? Minjun never had a problem with putting the kids to sleep despite them both having a fever, especially with you around" He pursed his lips.

"I... Well... I don't always get what goes on with Lee and your mom, Winter. Ever since-"

"Hey there, snowman" Minjun greeted me as he opened the door on my side of the car. I was born on a winter season hence the 'Winter' and 'snowman' nicknames.

I crossed my brows at my brother as he lifted a brow back at me.

As I went down my car and shut the door, a pair of small, soft palms grabbed onto my fingers. I giggled and lifted up my 4 years old nephew, Maki, as he cupped my cheeks.

"Maki-kun~ Where's your big sister?"

"Mae is sick. Mae has a fever. Mae is looking for you" I hummed and handed him over to his dad. I chatted with Minjun about Mae's fever as we went inside the living room where my mom came up to me and greeted me with a hug.

"Hi, mom"

"Oh Winter my angel. How are you?"

"I'm good. It's been a while, how are you and dad?"

"We're good so you shouldn't worry"

She gently pulled me to sit on the couch where she started patting my lap. Maki sat beside me. My brother went to check on Mae in their bedroom and June jogged to the kitchen where the smell of newly fried chicken was coming from.

"Are you sure you've been okay? Is there something you actually need? Has work been hard on you?" With mom bombarding me with questions, I felt something was off.

The urge to confront her was spiking up, yet my throat was constricted enough that I just tugged my hair behind my ear and smiled.

"I'm okay. I'm good with everything so far and ummm I can... well... get? You know, the things I need? They're nothing much but daily necessities if that's what you mean and ummm yeah, work is just work"

I could tell she wasn't reassured enough, neither was my brother who came out of the bedroom with Mae in his arms, a confused look in his face.

To avoid another parade of questions and a spoonful of uncomfortable silence, I stood up and gestured for Minjun to give Mae over. As I caught her in my arms, I clicked my tongue as I felt her burning skin on mine.

"Oh, baby" She looked at me for a second and wrapped her arms around my neck, resting her cheek on my shoulder. I held her tightly, remembering how much I missed these kids.

I might have told June he probably knows them more than I do, and that's mostly the truth. It's not that I've been a bad aunt or any of that sort, I just don't really see them often. Thrice a month is the maximum of days I come visit them and I make sure I spend those days very well.

But of course, I contact them through the phone every now and then.

Being busy at my job as a Music Teacher could be a reason, but it's mainly because...

'What was that again?'

'Why was I drifting away?'

No.

It wasn't the thing where I had told them not to call me that often as I start a new life...

It wasn't because I seeked for independence and freedom...

I was avoiding something...

Something that I could only find in here... In this house...

'Wait... what was it again?'