Heimdall x Reader

Sixteen

A cold wind swept over the roofs of Asgard.

Silence spread over your head like a veil of heavy cloth. It felt like the weight of the entire world was on your shoulders.

Heimdall's gaze was glued to you.

He didn't move, nor did a single word leave his mouth. Uncommon for his character.

Goose bumps grew all over your body.

You didn't know if this was a hurt kind of silence or one that came before the storm.

He just stared at you. His eyes were like two balls of ore, beautiful but so lifeless. It didn't seem like it was the first time he had looked at someone like that.

The thought made you wonder if anyone had ever managed to light up a spark of joy in his eyes.

Had he ever felt anything like honest happiness?

Or was he always so bitter, as if there was nothing beautiful to discover in all the nine realms, right to the farthest corner?

The rapid beating of your heart hammered against your chest.

But you weren't nervous. No, it was curiosity that made the hairs on the back of your neck rise.

You longed to hear an answer.

You wanted to know if all he needed was just a gentle word.

But when he let out a suppressed growl it was clear that his mood would not allow for honesty.

"Give me one reason why I shouldn't crush you under the sole of my shoe, you little bloodsucker.", he pressed out between clenched teeth.

He was visibly irritated. His gaze jumped from one spot to another and suddenly tried to avoid your sight.

You shook your head.

"There is none.", you simply said and took a step closer. "I'm sorry if my question upset you."

He took a step back as if you were some kind of dirt he didn't want to get all over himself.

Somehow, the way he looked at you had changed. He seemed less pleased now, more bothered. Before, your presence had been an inconvenience for him, but nothing to be actually angered about.

Now, he looked at you like a threat.

Or was that confusion on his face?

No, you knew what confusion looked like.

This was uncertainty.

You had seen a hint of it in his eyes before. But now it was as clear as dawn.

"I'm not upset!", he hissed back and turned to leave. "You're assuming things. What a stupid little know-it-all you are. As if you could tell how a god feels like. How I feel like!"

Your hand reached out in an attempt to calm him.

But he simply pulled away with the same kind of divine speed he had used to dodge Thor's wrath.

With flaming anger and a raised finger, Heimdall bent down to you and met your gaze.

"Be very careful what you do.", he said in a suddenly deadly calm voice. "Other gods would have chopped off your hands long ago. You are lucky that I am not so barbaric."

For a moment you tried to find something in his eyes that you could use to soften him.

It wasn't hard for you to figure out that he was insecure, desperate for something that was denied him. You didn't know what it was that he was missing, but you wanted to give it to him if you could.

The only question was whether he was willing to receive from you.

If he refused the help, then there would be no point in offering it to him again and again. But you wanted to try at least once.

Everyone deserved a chance.

"Heimdall...", you whispered with sadness in your voice.

His lips twitched.

"It is called my lord.", he corrected with arrogance. "Or son of Odin. God of foresight. But not Heimdall. You are not allowed to take my name in your mouth. You puny mortal."

With these words, he pushed you away and disappeared.

Both frustrated and hurt, you stopped and stared at the ground.

There were many stories of Heimdall's arrogance, his sharp tongue. Even of his vanity was reported.

But not one legend, not one song, told of the deep sadness you had found in his eyes.

Of course, he would never admit it. But it was there and it was a part of him. He knew it himself. It was probably even his greatest flaw.

Yet, something kept him from erasing it with the help of others.

Maybe he didn't want to.

Maybe other didn't want him to.

No matter the answer, you were helpless against it if he didn't wish to receive help.

And yet. You couldn't help but feel the need to be kind to him.

The way he had reacted to your simplest acts of friendliness had proven that he didn't experience such moments a lot.

And even though it was barely enough it still made a difference.

At least that's what you hoped for.

Maybe you were just too direct, too loud, too curious.

Heimdall was a god. And one of the important gods too. A son of Odin. Surely he was not used to people treating him as if he were an ordinary man.

"Was I rude?", you asked yourself as you walked down the street to your house. "I was just trying to be nice..."

But no matter how many times you thought things through, no matter how often you tried to find a different solution to the events that had happened this day, you couldn't find anything to do differently.

No matter the options, no matter the possibilities, you would have always acted the same.

So why was he upset?

What sore spot had he hit?

And why did he always react so extreme towards you even though he must have known about all of your actions before you even considered them?

"By Odin...", you sighed and threw your head back to take a look at the sky.

"Hard day at work?", a friendly voice asked with an audible smile.

You let out a huff.

"Don't get me started.", you glanced at Agathe with a smile.

One of her eyebrows rose.

"I have cake, if you want to talk over something."