Heimdall x Reader

Twenty-Nine

Frozen to ice, Heimdall lay there, eyes wide open, staring at you.

His lips were slightly parted. Warm breath brushed your face.

He smelled of apples.

Gently you smiled at him.

All at once he moved again.

And he hastily withdrew.

With a rough blow he pushed your hand away while his pressed on the cheek where you had touched him. It was as if he felt a burning in this spot.

As if he feared that his skin would rot.

"Don't you dare!", he growled.

With a shake of your head you tried to find the right words to apologise.

But when you took a look into his eyes, you realised that he was not angry.

He was afraid.

"Heimdall.", his name came to your lips like a prayer, a request, a plea.

He dodged your hand again.

But this time you did not want to give up. If he was always running away, then you had to start not letting him off the hook so easily.

Understanding was good. But sometimes more was needed.

With a determined expression on your face, you drew your eyebrows together and followed him.

"Stay away from me!", he hissed, his hand on his sword.

He was like a cat that felt threatened. Like an animal that knew nothing but to defend itself with claws and teeth.

"Why are you running away?", you asked and followed him to the edge of the wall. "You don't fear ordinary people."

He bared his teeth. This was his last warning.

All at once you found yourself with his blade at your neck again.

"You are not an ordinary human.", even if he did not want to be, even if he loathed it, his voice was full of fear.

He feared you. Or rather, what you had to offer.

Caring.

Gentleness.

Friendship.

Affection.

Never before had he been shown any of these things, let alone treated with them.

He had always been the one people hid from. No one had wanted to be near him for fear he would use their thoughts.

And that's exactly what he had done. He had used his power against them. Otherwise he would not have become at all as powerful as he was now.

And then you had stepped into his path.

He feared that he could not rely on his instincts with you.

He had to take you as you were, had to rethink his words, had to be careful what he did so as not to ruin what you could offer him.

A friend.

No, more than that.

Partnership.

Silence without loneliness.

At last he was so close to escaping from the darkness he had created for himself.

And he was afraid. Oh, how he feared leaving his safe haven only to taste something he desired.

He feared it would not be worth it.

And yet.

How much he wanted it.

You could see it in his trembling eyes, in the way he held the sword, so powerless and unconvinced.

His breath was quick. He might even have sweated if he had been of less divine attunement.

"Heimdall.", you whispered.

You were not afraid of him. You weren't afraid of what he could have done to you.

He wouldn't hurt you.

He didn't want to. One didn't have to be a mind reader to see that.

A shaky breath left his lips.

Angrily, he gritted his teeth. But he was incapable of being furious for long.

"Go.", he said.

You did not move.

You refused.

Heimdall's lips began to tremble with frustration.

"Why won't you go?", it was a desperate question.

He had reached the end of his rope. Like an animal, he was trapped. And he was ready to surrender.

But not without one last desperate attempt.

"I...", your eyes wandered past him for a moment to look at the sky. "I feel comfortable in your presence. Don't you?"

"No one feels comfortable with me!", he suddenly thundered. "They all avoid me. They all condemn me. They know that one wrong thought is the end of them."

"But you don't know what I'm thinking."

"That doesn't mean you think good of me. It just means I don't have evidence."

Swallowing thickly, you leaned towards him.

The tip of his blade pressed into your neck, leaving a mark that would never fade.

Heimdall hesitated.

His grip on the sword loosened.

"Heimdall...", slowly raised his hand to gently push the blade away from you.

He let it happen.

"Do not say my name.", it was more a request than a command.

"I do not want to betray you."

You stepped closer. Your hand rose again to touch him.

He took a step back, shaking his head.

Stones rolled under his soles and over the edge into the depths. One more step and he would fall.

"I fear no betrayal from you.", he finally admitted. "But I? I will betray you."

You frowned.

"Why?", you asked, a smile of disbelief on your lips.

For a moment he avoided your eyes.

"Because that's my job. To read minds for the Allfather."

"But... You don't have to.", you managed to touch his cheek with the tips of your fingers.

A soft sigh rolled from his lips as he closed his eyes and allowed himself for the breath of a second to lean into your touch.

But he quickly pulled away again.

"The Allfather wants me to read minds for him. He wants me to tell him what people think about him. If they are loyal. If they need to be eliminated."

You stepped closer.

This time he didn't move back. He probably knew that there was no way to go anymore.

Not unless he desired to be smash to pieces.

"My mind is locked away from you, whatsoever reason it might be.", you raised both hands to grab his face. "You don't have to be afraid to betray me. You can't."

"And that is exactly why the All-Father will destroy me.", he replied through clenched teeth. "Like an old tool. No matter what I chose to do, there won't be a happy ending."

At lost for words you frowned and shook your head.

"I wish I could find words to convince you not to run away from me."

"There are no words strong enough."

A sad smile appeared on your lips.

"Very well.", you pulled him into a kiss.