Self-conversation diaries

Life in the Top School in Singapore

*PLZ READ STORY DESCRIPTION FIRST!!*

I'm dying.

I don't know if that's normal, probably is since I am a year one student after all. But having a hard time in the top school in the country and a broken family can really mess up your head, heart and feelings. I wonder if everyone in year 1 is like this.

You know, with parents realising that they missed a random optional online parents briefing weeks later and then blaming me for not informing them. I mean I told them from the very start and even snapped my fingers in front of their eyes before telling them. But as usual, they said that they were "busy" and pushed it aside like they do to everything I tell them.

I'm hardly surprised at this point.

What does surprises me though, is how all my classmates and schoolmates around me still thinks that I am the perfect optimistic, positive, funny, cheerful, adorable short little girl that I probably am, but only on the outside.

But, no one knows how damaged, how broken I am on the inside. And given how smart all my friends are, I'm truly shocked they haven't figured it out yet. But I guess its only a matter of time. I'm also glad and surprised that I started this "self-convo" diary-private-blog method or whatever you call it. Probably because I realised the joy of reading through these messages and responding to them, but also because in this new school, things are much more stressful and I really need these types of "monologues" to help me cope, remain sane, and basically survive.

Well, this is 9:31 pm on 13 February 2023, a horrible Monday, and I, myself, Violet, is signing out.

Farewell.

___________________________

I hope you write to me more, self, this message has truly reached me well. I wish you, myself, the best of luck, best wishes, and good bye. For now at least. :))