female celebrity comfort stories

crushing disappointment | taylor swift

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today was one of the biggest maths tests of my entire life. it made up 60% of my grade and it would virtually determine my entire college career.

it being my final year stuff like this really added up. the moment i found out about it i started studying and never stopped.

that was over a month ago. i haven't left the house or seen my friends in weeks. i eat at my desk and sleep won't come easy.

i've worked my ass off for so long and i really hope it pays off.

the stress is starting to get to me though. my body would start shaking uncontrollably at random times.

i don't feel hungry anymore, sleep feels impossible right now and i can't focus for more than a minute.

my body feels uneasy, my legs are heavy and my heart race is constantly through the roof.

i've talked a lot with my therapist, linda over the past month. she's cleared out her schedule for the day after the test just so we can talk about how i was feeling.

she decided it was best to not force me to go to my sessions in the weeks before the exam, it was stressing me out even more not having those two hours every couple of days away from my work.

every moment counts, every single minute, every single second. that one extra minute could get me the A*.

i wanted that A, i needed it.

i've been avoiding mama for the last 2 weeks as well. i know, i just know as soon as i look into her eyes she'll give me the look. that look will break me. i'll fall into a million pieces and i don't have time for that right now.

walking out of that test my anxiety only worsened. we had to sit in a separate room and wait for our teacher to give us the results. this is and unusual occurrence but there's only 6 of us so it wouldn't take long.

that hour waiting was excruciating. worse than anything i've experienced. my palms were sweating, my hands shaking.

it felt as if nothing in the world could calm this feeling.

hearing the door open my heart dropped to my stomach. i felt sick, i could barely register what was happening around me.

i grabbed my paper without even looking at it and ran out the doors, leaning against the wall outside while i vomited. the stress got to be too much. i guess my body was looking for a way to clear it all out.

i wiped the corner of my mouth and finally looked at the paper.

B+. i got a B+. i failed. i completely failed. how was any college meant to accept me now. they were all going to laugh in my face and say i wasn't good enough for them. and they'd be right. because all i am is a B+ student.

i ran straight to my car and climbed into the drivers side, throwing my bag in the footwell of the passengers side. i drive straight home, to mama. i didn't even care that i had other classes to go to.

i probably broke a million traffic laws but it didn't matter. i needed mama right then and there.

i had to pull over three times to vomit on the side of the road but it didn't slow me down. i reached the door of the house in a fraction of the time if would take a regular person.

there was this ache in my body that could only be fixed by my best friend. i so desperately wanted to collapse into her arms and sob for so long. i'd been denying myself that and it was eating me alive from the inside out.

i didn't even bother to lock my car or close the front door. i ran straight to her studio, that was where she hid herself most days.

i burst thought the door and looked into her eyes, my legs gave out from under me and i fell to the floor. in just a moment she was at my side holding me in her arms.

all that stress and anxiety felt so insignificant when she had her arms wrapped around me. her comforting warmth and her gentle presence made it all better.

we sat together on that floor for the best part of 2 hours. no words were exchanged, the only sounds echoing through the room were my tears and the soft purring from meredith.

mama picked me up softly and walked her way through the house closing the door and up the stairs. placing me down gently on her bed and kneeling down before me.

she untied my shoe laces and cautiously pulled the worn out converse off my feet. pulling the hoodie off the torso and replacing it with one of her own.

she climbed into the bed next to me and held me so tightly while i cried myself to sleep on her chest.

"i failed mama" was the very first thing i said after waking up from my nap. my voice was hoarse and my throat scratched.

"it's okay baby, mamas so proud of you no matter what happened today. you worked so hard and that's all i'll ever ask for you. do what you love and don't give up while trying to get there. mama will love you whatever you do. you'll always be my little angel y/n."

her pale fingers run through my neglected hair. "i'm so disappointed in myself." i let out a quivering sigh. my lip wobbled and more tears threatened to fall from my bloodshot eyes.

"it okay sweetheart, no one will ever expect you
to be perfect at everything you try. your genius will never fail to amaze me, i don't know who you got it from but you're smarter than anyone i'll ever know. you just need to take care of yourself first my love. we have to get you big and strong before you can take over the world."

she tickled my belly, letting out light chuckles. mama always knew exactly what i needed to hear. it like she could read my mind.

"why don't we go get ice cream and then we'll talk about getting you to see linda sometime huh?" i hummed in reply and dug my face back in her neck. i really couldn't wait to get back to feeling myself again.

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1083 words.
not proof read sorry

taylor's such a cutie. would sell my kidney to get a hug from her. <3

i was the only one to fail my maths test in my whole class last week and the kid next to me laughed :/

haven't been back to school since.

i also failed my driving theory exam today and i cried in the car park. this week really isn't it.

sorry for the inactivity, i literally have no motivation to even move but i hope i'll get something good written on the weekend.

also wanted to say thank u guys sm for 5k reads. means a lot <3

marley :)