Stay with me | Minsung

Scars

Jisung was panicking and running as fast as he could, but not for long, Minho ran after him and caught up.
Minho grabbed Jisung's arm so he wouldn't get get away.

"Ow! Let go of me!" screamed jisung.

"What do you mean 'ow' I barely touched you!" Minho said in defence, he wouldn't hurt him even if he had to.

But then the thought hit him.

Minho pulled jisung closer and quickly rolled up the sleeve on his hoodie.
His face went pale after what he saw.

There were deep cuts covering his wrists and arms. Some were already scars while others seemed still fresh and bloody.

Jisung tried to cover his arm before he saw it but it was too late.

"Jisung- y- you, why didn't you tell me?" Minho stutterd, he was still in shock.

"tell you what? That's none of your fucking business, okay?"
Jisung wasn't sure why he was mad at minho since it wasn't his fault, but he was scared, scared of showing his vulnerable side. Minho will definitely judge him now and think he's a freak.

"Ji... I didn't know you had problems, maybe if you told me, I could help you."

"You can't help me with this."

"I lost my father and-"
Minho got cut off before he could finish his sentence.

"I don't care about your father! Just because he died it doesn't mean that you're the only one who's allowed to feel depressed!"
Jisung hated this, did minho think that everything was about him?

"W-what are you saying? I wanted to tell you that I lost my dad and I don't want to lose you too...but now I see how it is."
Minho looked at Jisung coldly.

"wait no i-i didn't mean it like that!"
Then jisung realised that he had misunderstood what Minho was trying to say, he tried to stop minho from leaving.

"Don't touch me! And don't you dare to ever speak about my father that way!"
Minho finally saw the real jisung, he couldn't believe that he told him so much about his feelings while jisung thought it wasn't a big deal.

...

"jisung you fucking moron. This is why nobody likes you, you always ruin everything with that ugly mouth of yours" Jisung said while quietly talking to himself.

His parents weren't home, as usual. He was sitting on the bathroom floor in his underwear. He took a razor blade that was hidden in a cabinet. He didn't even hesitate before dragging it across his thighs multiple times, until the white bathroom floor looked like a murder scene. His tears were dripping on the wounds, not from pain, but because he already missed Minho. Jisung regrets every single word he said to him.
He remembered how Minho's lit up everytime he spoke about nice memories with his father, 'how could i be so ignorant and say that?' he thought.

When minho got home his mother noticed his red eyes and a few few tears that didn't have enough time to dry out.
She wanted to ask about it but it was obvious that minho wasn't in the mood to talk.

Minho went to his room, he recalled all the moments when him and jisung laid on his bed together and talked for hours or watched movies and laughed while playing games.
'why do i feel sad? After all he was a bad person, so i should be happy i got rid of him soon enough, right?' Minho mind was filled with questions like these.
Today was just too much for him so he went to sleep.

...

The two boys who were once always together couldn't even look eachother in the eyes anymore. Of course people noticed, Jisung's friends were asking about what happened, but jisung said it wasn't important.
Ms.Kim noticed too, she thought that maybe they just had a fight, but after a while she realised it was probably more serious than that.

"And jisung will work with Minho, please go sit together and do your work." said Ms.Kim

"Ma'am can i change my partner?" Minho asked, he was hoping she'd let him be with anyone else other than jisung.

"I'm sorry but no, as you can see everyone has a partner already."

Minho sighed. He took his bag and sat beside jisung.
Jisung silently worked on half of the math problems while Minho did the other half.

Ms. Kim was trying to hide the disappointment on her face, she was hoping they'd at least exchange a few words and of course she felt bad about this'll situation, they were her favourite students after all.

The week slowly went by, both of the stubborn males were physically and mentally tired. Minho tried to take more than his average dose of antidepressants, he thought that it might help since he felt more depressed everyday.

Jisung on the other hand just stuck to his routine, get up, go to school, come home, self harm and cry himself to sleep. It was obvious that he was out of energy already since he hasn't eaten anything the whole week. But who was there to stop him? No one, his parents didn't pay any attention to him or the fact that his hands were alarmingly skinny, his face was pale and his hair started to fall out.

They didn't notice.

Although someone did, Felix, Chan and Jeongin wouldn't stop worrying about him. Jisung decided to skip school so he wouldn't have to deal with them.

...

"Han Jisung, come here right now!" yelled Jisungs Mother.

"yes mom?" jisung nervously answered when he walked over to the kitchen.

"the principal called, apparently you weren't attending school for like 2 weeks!"

"o-oh i just didn't feel well, so i stayed home." jisung lied, but not really. The truth is that he did feel really tired and sick but only from a lack of nutrition and sleep.

"okay, but you have to go to school tomorrow... You look a bit pale by the way, you should go out more." she pointed out.

"um, yeah.. Sure"  as much as jisung didn't want to attend school tomorrow, he couldn't skip it this time.

...

Minho saw jisung enter the class for the first time after two weeks. He looked terrible, messy hair, dark circles under his eyes, drowning in clothes that looked even bigger on him than before. 'no, I shouldn't be worried about him' Minho thought to himself. But it was painful to see jisung like this.

The first few periods went by fast, Minho was occasionally glancing over at jisung to make sure he was okay.

Eventually lunch began. Felix saw jisung in their class so he made sure that jisung wouldn't disappear somewhere just to avoid them.

"ah look who's back" chan said excitingly, he wasn't really excited to see jisung in that state but was happy that the younger was okay.

"hi..." jisung greeted them with a small forced smile.

During lunch they talked about random topics, trying to avoid any questions about jisung since he'd be uncomfortable. But there was one thing that someone had to point out.

"Ji, you've lost so much weight, you should eat something with us." jeongin said innocently, he didn't mean to offend jisung in any way, but he probably did since Chan gave him a 'don't say that' look.

"no thank you, I'm okay"

"please jisung, just eat...we're really worried about you" Felix added.

"Can you fucking stop forcing me to eat!?" Jisung accidentally shouted, the whole room went silent. Some students started whispering.

Jisungs had enough, he quickly stood up to leave, but all of a sudden he felt dizzy and his vision went black. His body couldn't take it anymore.

Minho saw it so he quickly ran over to jisung.

A/n:
Finally i wrote a new chapter haha, i doubt it's worth the wait though.
I hope none of my fellow readers relate to their struggles, but if anyone needs to hear this right now, this message is for you... It may seem that things are hopeless right now, but I know that there's so much more for you in the future, so right now just focus on getting better and be good to yourself, I know that you'll get through this. ❤️
Please remember you are important and loved!