Taking Control

Chapter 1

Someone told me long ago

There's a calm before the storm.

- Creedance Clearwater Revival, Have You Ever Seen the Rain?

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Chapter 1

Five months earlier...

The library at Fairmount University was depressing. It was the first week back after winter break, so the building was empty. The computer screens were black with a light coating of dust and the librarian was asleep at her desk. Cold drafts of air blew through the open space, giving the place an even more desolate feel.

I sat staring at my laptop, my mind wandering. I was not in a particularly good mood, which is exactly why the library was my hideout of choice. There was still thirty minutes before my next class and I had nothing to do to fill the time. I was bored. Bored with school, bored with my day, bored with my life. I was more than halfway through college; I had just turned 21; I was in the prime of my life. So why was I so disappointed? Something fabulous should be going on, right? Nope. Just bored.

I looked up from my laptop and scanned the empty library. I hated this place. Too much time had been spent here over the last three years and I was sick of it.

I focused back on the screen and scrolled through my music library, waiting until a song caught my eye. Music was like that for me. I didn't pick the song; it was as if the song jumped out and asked to get played. Choosing one of my favorites, I put earphones in and turned the music all the way up. Come as You Are by Nirvana blared through the speakers, allowing Kurt's deep voice to drown my mind.

Music took me to a place that didn't really exist. I lived in my own world when I listened to the lyrics of a good song. I could feel and breathe and wish for the life I really wanted. Not the one I was stuck hiding in, just like I was hiding in this library. I needed to stop being so frustrated and pissy. I was secretly miserable and something needed to change. But I had said that a million times before and never did anything about it.

Lost in the world that Kurt's voice dragged me into, I closed my eyes and leaned back in the chair. Maybe school wasn't so bad. Maybe I'm just stressed and tired and being a baby. Majoring in finance was hard and maintaining a high GPA to keep a scholarship was even harder. I needed summer break and tequila. See, your making excuses again.

I shook my head and sighed. I always made promises to myself to do something different but I always broke them, and the cycle just keeps on going. Nothing's going to change and I would be fine.

Suddenly the earphones were ripped out of my ears, making me jump. "What the f-!"

"Hey babe." Jason said as he gave me a kiss on the cheek. He sat down and threw his backpack on the table. His short blonde hair stuck up in all directions; I guessed that he just woke up. "Why are you hiding out in here?"

"Jesus Jason, you scared me." I answered, smiling at my boyfriend. "And I'm not hiding."

"Yes you are. And you're listening to that shitty, depressing music again."

"It's not shitty! Nirvana is amazing!" I responded forcefully, but he ignored me. "Did you just wake up?"

"Yeah, there was no way I was sitting through Econ this morning."

I rolled my eyes. By morning he meant noon. The kid slept more than a dead person. If he wasn't decently intelligent he would have failed out of college by now.