stiles in new york

understand?

Stiles pov

I woke up only a couple minutes later on Derek's bed while he sat at the adge with his back towards me

"I don't want to be here anymore"

I say in a tired voice, I'm not sure why I said it, but I did and I mean it

"oh, we can go to your house, if you wa-"

"no Derek, I don't won't to be here anymore"

"what do you mean"

"I mean beacon hills, this place is tearing me apart physically and mentally"

"b-"

"Derek...."

I cut him of

"I am going to miss you guys I'm going to miss us but I just can't be here, it's too much pain"

"let me come with you"

"no, I need a new and fresh start"

"look I know we all had some rough memories here but just leaving won't make it better"

"I think it will! And if it doesn't I'll probably be back in a second after I realize that but now it seems like the right decision"

"are you really sure?"

"100%"

"then I am okey with it, Only if you call once every week"

"sure"

"where are you even going to go?"

"I have an uncle that lives in New York, we used to be really close u till my dad started drinking"

"ow, that's far..."

"I can visit you know?"

"I know but... I can't protect you in new York. And what if it turns out you have leukemia and you are going to die without spending fun time with us!"

"In my mental state right now nothing is fun okey!"

I continue after taking a break to breath

"after we get the results I'm leaving, and there is nothing you can do to change that!"

"okay"

"are you going to go back to bed or..."

"no"

Derek replied coldly

"you should"

I say with a lifeless voice, after I had laid myself comfortably I feel his weight beside me on the bed

I shouldn't have been so hard, he doesn't want me gone i understand, but does he not care about what I want?