Note: This story is unedited, and contains explicit content that can cause an emotional trigger. Read this with that caution in mind. You have been warned!
Date started writing: February 17, 2023
Date finished writing: February 25, 2023
Word count: 10,021
DROWNED
CHAPTER 1
It was a late evening on July 18, 2017. I was with a friend... well, a confidant named Kianna. We were close friends, more than what people may assume. So we did things behind everyone's back; you know, things that friends usually don't do. I'm not talking about sex. We did shit that was a lot worse than sex, like smoking, drinking, stealing, and a lot more that I tried to forget.
That night, Kianna called me as I was walking home from work. Even though I didn't pick up the call, I already knew what it was about, where to go, and what we were going to do. I immediately turned a complete opposite turn to where my block was, and headed to the same place where we committed all of those shits we did. And yes, I refer to it as "shit" for I think it's the only word that can best describe what we were doing at the time.
Yet for some reason, on my way to that place, her calls never stopped. She wasn't like that before, but since I was socially awkward to pick up calls in public places to begin with, I didn't answer once. Still this day, that haunts me for the rest of my life. If only I had the courage to pick up her calls, maybe, just maybe.
"Jason?" I felt a tap on my shoulder which frantically made me turn. "What?!"
"Are you ok?" She asked, rubbing her hand gently on my shoulder.
"I'm fine Lila, I'm good. Don't scare me like that," I replied, brushing her hand off me.
"Doesn't seem like it." She held a pause, pulled one of the empty chairs behind me and sat. "What really happened that day?" Her eyes locked, and face swirll spirally and zoomed.
"What are you saying?" I pushed her off, pulled my bag sitting behind me, and joltedly stood up from my seat.
"What the fuck?" She held her ground and everybody around us turned their head towards both of us.
"I'm not saying anything." In disbelief she held her breath, tucked her lips, and Matthew who was sitting beside her stood next to her pose.
"Why are you asking that?" I gunned my sight to Lila. In return, everybody's eyes glared upon me. They gave me the dirtiest look on their face, and Matthew furiously swung his fist at me, grabbing by my collar, and forcefully pulling me up to his face.
"That's enough Matthew!" Lila pulled him away from me and the rest of the squad came running down to help as I fixed my shirt.
"What happened?" Hushes and buzzes and inaudible whispering clouded the room in an instant.
"What's happening to you Jason? You weren't like this before." Lila reached out for me, but again, I dodged. I moved a step back away from all of them, and walked out. Never turning my head back once.
As I bolted for the door. I felt a gut feeling that someone chased me outside, and before they could reach me, I came to an abrupt stop, and turned my back around ready to snap. "Why are you following me Lila?"
"What did I do to make you that upset?" She said, standing tall across me with her eyes all worked up.
"Then why are you asking me what happened that day? I already told you a hundred times Lilac! That, I. Don't. Know!" My lungs bursted, and everything that I've been bottling up suddenly dissipated into the thin air.
"That day? What are you on about? I never asked about it Jason. I was just simply asking if you were going to the house party at Matthew's house." She calmly replied, and suddenly the air boiled down.
"That's not what you asked me." I shook my head, and Matthew came out from the room the second I thought about leaving again. "Jason!" He called out, jogging towards me. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to," he apologised as he met with us.
"What the fuck is going on here?" Are you fucking with me?" I raised my tone, and Lilac tucked her lips as he reached for my hand. "No. Why would we do that?" She replied.
"I don't believe you."
"You don't have to." Matthew wrapped her hand around Lila, pulling her away from me as he gently nudged me away. "You don't have to come to the party either." Lila lifted her chin to Matthew. "But... in case you changed your mind. I can pick you up, just call me," changing his words.
"I got rid of my phone," I answered back, and Lila came to his defence. "No. We'll pick you up. For sure." And they both left before I could even answer.
I never understood what that interaction was at the school. Now that I think about it. Maybe it was a sign that I shouldn't have gone to that party.
Doorbell rings. "J.J, someone's at the door!" Mom called out from the living room couch watching the television.
"I got it." I walked out from my room after hours of contemplation to whether to attend the party or not. But I still came out to that door dressed, and was ready to go.
"Is that Andrea? Are you going somewhere?"
I wished it was her as mom asked, but I never replied.
"So, are you going?" Lila greeted me as I swung the door open. Matthew was waiting patiently at the car with his head poking out from the window. "Come on!" He hollered at me.
I guess I had to.
The drive there was quiet, I could almost feel the vibration of the car rigging my chest, and the sound of the engine gearing on as Matthew leaned on to the steering wheel. It only took one breath to break the silence and Lila stepped in, "I'm sorry about earlier."
"Forget about it." I sighed, and leaned over the window dodging their small glances from the rear-view mirror.
"But honestly, are you ok?" Lila shoved the question, luring the silence back.
"Yeah." I let out a deep sigh. "I just have a lot on my mind right now."
Both of them just nodded, and since then, the rest of the car ride was silent until we got there.
