Drowned
Chapter 7
Mirrors fogged as my breath touched it. The sunlight that drew earlier in the afternoon hid behind the grey clouds.
I thought finding her will finally solve a lot of the questions sitting on my mind. But that wasn't the case, for it only caused more questions that even I can't answer; even if it can be answered, I don't think I can comprehend any of it, or even understand it.
I came there with the hopes of unravelling a mystery sitting rent free in my cabinet. Yet as I left, I rode the bus home with a million thoughts jolting inside my brain.
Why do I feel like this day will never end?
As I laid down, I closed my eyes and tried to pick apart all of the things we talked about.
"So, how's life here? Did you make new friends?" I enthusiastically asked Kianna as she answered giggling in her seat. "I made a few, but they never felt like home like you guys do," she said.
After the laughter settled down, Kianna clears her throat and straightens up her posture. Suddenly, her eyes shifted, as if they glowed into another colour. "So, why did you come here Lila?"
"What do you mean?" I pulled my head away and took a step back.
I didn't expect her tone to drastically change in that split of a second. It sounded as if she was a different person. "Don't tell me." She hushed me as I was trying to find a different angle to approach her sudden shift. "I know why you came here. So, let's talk about it. Shall we?" She pointed at the nearest bench, and we sat there for an hour as I soaked every last drop of information she gave me within that period like a sponge.
It wasn't real. Well, that's what I wanted to believe as I spent the rest of the time in the bus reflecting.
By the time I arrived at my stop, I took one last deep breath before I landed my feet off the vehicle. There then I saw Matthew across the street waiting inside his car. Why is he here?
He had his window down, and he poked his head as I slowly approached his car. And, before I could even ask him why he was coincidentally there at my stop as I unboarded, the lock on the passenger's side door clicked. "Get inside, we need to talk," he said.
I followed his words without a single doubt in my mind and got on the passenger's side. He was as silent as a dead rock as I stretched my feet inside, and just what he normally does every time I get inside his car; he leaned over at my seat and pulled the seatbelt for me, and buckled it.
"Where are we going?" I asked, but he just gave me a cold shoulder as she stepped on the gas.
About a moment in the road, he glanced over his side mirror for a second before opening a conversation. "We need to talk." Again, the same words he said to me earlier.
"About what?" Shuffling my eyes around, holding my seatbelt in angst, tucking my lips.
"It's not a matter of what, but why.
Why did you cheat on me?"
"What do you mean? I don't understand. Was this about what Jason said that night? I already told you Matthew..."
"Just answer the question Lila. Why did you cheat?" His voice was calm, but still I could feel every word he said like a punch on my chest. His eyes pierced through me everytime I caught them glimpse past me. His hands drew bolder as his grip tightened, and with every second that passed without me giving an answer, his jaw locked deeper.
"I already know everything Lila. Don't make this a lot harder for the both of us. Please, don't lie to me." His voice thinned out, and cracks started to seep in his masculine voice.
As the roar of the engine growled louder, the more silent I became. For some reason, my mind went blank, and every word in my vocabulary evaporated into the tension building between us.
"Why did you do it?" Water filled under his eyes, and after a few more seconds, they looked like an ocean holding a flood of tears. "Why?" And the rain finally poured, valleying at the side of his cheeks, and down his chin it went.
"I'm sorry." Is the only thing my tongue manages to say to him when in reality I have a million things to say. I wanted to explain everything, but I couldn't bring myself to find all the words to tell him, so I didn't bother speaking at all after that.
He slammed in hand on the wheel, and kicked the brake which made the car force stop in the middle of nowhere surrounded by trees and signs and the searing sound of the night.
"Why?" He dug his head into the steering wheel, and screamed his lungs out while tears came flooding from his eyes. His cry echoed inside the car, and the reverberation felt like waves crashing down on my chest.
"I gave you everything Lila. Wasn't that enough?" He cried out, and the light inside the car vanished as soon as he killed the engine. "I need to take some air." He shook his head while wiping his tears with his arm, and when he opened the driver's seat to get off the car, a sudden flash of light beamed from the back.
Matthew stood outside, and waved the car behind us to overtake. As the car drove past ours, it made an abrupt stop in front of us; tires screeched, and there was a thud in the door as the driver got out.
Matthew threw himself back in the car as soon as the man approached us. Matthew turned the engine back on, and as the headlight flared at him, it was Gavin who was standing there with us.
"What's happening?" I asked as I saw Matthew alarmy pull the hand brakes up.
"Don't worry Lila. I'm here!" Gavin shouted as he drew his hand at the back of his pocket, pulling a gun which he immediately pointed at us, and bang; white muzzle flashes before my eyes and felt a ray of vibration shock throughout my body.
It wasn't just a single gunshot, but two more followed. As the smoke from the barrel dissipates, Gavin went running towards me. He lifted the door up, but it was locked. "Let's go." He offered, knocking on the glass window as I watched Matthew slumped over in the driver's seat.
Blood was oozing out from his chest, and his eyes turned white. His jaws dropped, and his hands were thrown up in the chair as if he fell from a high building and splat onto that chair.
My lungs shrieked as I agitatedly unbuckled my seatbelt. I immediately covered my palms to Matthew's chest trying to stop the bleeding, but the blood only spread on my hand and spilled everywhere inside the car.
"We don't have much time!" Gavin's knock became harder on the glass, and eventually when he saw that I wasn't budging on my seat, he smashed the window down with his pistol, and unlocked it from inside, slithered his hand over the smashed window.
"Don't touch me! Help!" I wailed pushing him off.
He covered my mouth with his hand, and dragged me out of the car. "Shut the fuck up!" He pushed me off the ground.
"Why did you do that you fucking monster." I went at him, throwing my fist towards the air as he tried to pin me further down.
"Because he was going to kill you Lila, and I didn't want that to happen so I killed him first. I saved you," he said in his convincing tone.
His eyes widened as tears came out of my eyes blurring my vision. His hand grabbed tighter the more I tried to fight him back. I was hopeless in the hands of a monster yearning for mercy.
"You're so beautiful Lila," he whispered, and clawed his way up to my neck. Every touch of his lips felt like needle piercing through my neck, and while his hands ominously unveiled me, darkness started to corrupt my head.
Just like that, I felt like I was back to where I was, hopeless, powerless, useless. I felt like there weren't enough words to describe what I was but a loser, and a shadow out shined by the clouded sun.
"Just let me love you Lila, so just shut up!" He launched his hand, clasping my throat, and with all of the strength left within me, I screamed—and screamed—and screamed, until I couldn't anymore.
My eyes closed in acceptance, and felt water touch my skin. It dropped and made a chime-like sound every time it landed on my cheek.
It must be raining. I smiled, and everything went blank.
