Saving the Sun

-6-

James left the tower upset. Regulus just didn't understand why he had to eat the way he did. No one else ever said anything, so why did Regulus need to say anything? He didn't know where to go, so he started wandering around the castle. He wasn't ready to go back to his dorm yet. He was exhausted, but he knew that there was no way he was going to be able to sleep anytime soon.

He walked around for a couple of hours, and somehow managed to not run into anyone. Normally, the prefects still had rounds till late, and once those were over Filch roamed the halls. It was nearing four am when he made his way through the portrait hole, finally having gotten the pressure in his chest to subside and his hands to stop shaking. As he walked into the dorm, however, he found Sirius awake sitting at the end of his bed.

"James, where were you? It is four in the fucking morning for Godric's sake!" Sirius whisper yelled. He wasn't dumb enough to be loud and risk waking up Remus.

"I went for a walk. I didn't realize it was so late," James tried to defend himself, but Sirius didn't buy it.

"I could maybe believe that if you got back at midnight, even one, but not four!"

"I don't know what you want me to say! I couldn't sleep, and I wanted to go for a walk. I'm sorry it ended up being so late!" James flopped down onto his bed, face first. He did not want to deal with Sirius right after the conversation that he had just had with his brother.

Sirius sighed, and didn't know what to say anymore either. He looked at James and noticed how tired he seemed. He had noticed that James seemed tired more often the past couple of days. He honestly just wanted James to get some sleep, and that was the only reason he was upset when he had woken up at two in the morning and had found James' bed empty. He didn't understand how James could be so tired, but then not sleep. So, Sirius crawled to the top of the bed, and pulled the blanket up, causing James to fall off the bed.

"Sirius!" James exclaimed.

"Get into bed, James. You need to sleep," James rolled his eyes at him from the floor.

"I was in bed before you knocked me off," with that he crawled into his bed next to Sirius, "Also, I can sleep alone you know."
"I know," Sirius grinned, "but I need to make sure you actually sleep. It is my job as your best friend."

"Whatever," James said while rolling over, "You know we haven't done this since we were in third year. We fit much better then."

"Well, sucks to be you then. I think we fit just fine," Sirius then finally laid down completely and went to bed, and that was the first time all school year James did not get up at five in the morning to go work out on the quidditch pitch.

-

Regulus would be lying if he said he wasn't even more worried about James. It had never crossed his mind that James wouldn't realize how worrisome his behavior is. He knew it wouldn't be an easy conversation, but he really wasn't prepared for the one he ended up having.

He spent the entire next week trying to figure out what he should do, or say to James. He tried to get James' attention, but he hardly looked in Regulus' direction. He realized that they didn't have any classes together, and they never crossed paths in the hall, but he had thought he would have found a way to talk to James by now. His only options were to corner him in the Great Hall before or after dinner, or hope he comes to the astronomy tower again.

Regulus spent every night in the astronomy tower, as the result of wanting to talk to James. He didn't want to risk missing his chance. However, James didn't come to the tower again until the 11th of December. That was an entire three weeks of James completely ignoring Regulus, and three weeks of Regulus watching James from across the Great Hall.