della doesn't let most hate get to her, but that doesn't mean she's impenetrable
contains: angst, insecurities (anxiety), unintentional self-harm. just dark stuff.
i've been through it lmao. sorry it's really triggering. a few of you requested angst and i'm not really good at that so i bring forward stuff that's inspired by what i've gone through (altered because della's problems are different from mine)
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after 'we missed you'
"Guys! Come out!" Jake yelled out. "Gather in the living room! Everyone!" he made his way to the couch while holding Della's hand.
"I'm scared..." she told Jake timidly.
"It's okay. Just get it done and we'll go back to normal in no time," he didn't want to tell her that it would go well, as he himself won't know just how angry his other members will be. "Good luck."
Besides, she was greatly at fault.
Jake could see the amusement and relief on the guys' faces as they slowly came to the living room. On the other hand, Della only stared at her lap with wide eyes, trying to hold back tears and a potential panic attack..
"What is it?" Jungwon asked, closing the master bedroom door behind him.
"Della has something to say," Jake leaned back with crossed arms. "Lala?"
"I-" she took a few deep breaths. "I'm sorry for ignoring all of you," short and simple.
The seven men stayed quiet while patiently waiting for an explanation, yet the girl was as still as a rock.
"Is that it? Tell them what you told me," the sternness in Jake's voice was evident, though not to the point of being mistaken for anger.
"A.. sasaeng- a crazy fan got a hold of my Katalk contact and they said some things that really got to me," her eyes were starting to tear up again.
"She didn't report to the company or to us," Jake added.
"It was so fucking dumb. I was hoping that I could have you guys hate me and eventually break up with me so you can move on and get proper girlfriends who's not shitty and fucked like me and have them all to yourselves-" Della suddenly went on and on.
"Della stop," Jay cut her off.
"But at the same time, I don't want that at all and I want to keep things as they are-" Sunghoon called her name next, yet she still kept going. "But then that's incredibly selfish of me because who the fuck has more than one lover and just lets them share?"
