Deja Vu (SatoGou)

Chapter 21

"Will you go to the dance with me?" Ash asks me, from his spot beside me on the sofa. I'm lying reading a book, legs up over his lap. I look over the top of it at him, momentarily confused, until I remember the 'Snowflake Ball'- this year's winter themed dance. The lack of Halloween school dance this year left a lot of students reeling, and it's all anyone's been talking about for days, since they announced it.

"I don't know," I say, smirking. "I'll have to get back to you on that."

"What, are you waiting to see if someone better asks?" He teases, rolling his eyes.

We've been dating for a couple of months now. We've officially gotten back to the way that we were, except now the flirting is for sure real. Everyone at school soon figured out we were dating, when Ash started unashamedly holding my hand in public. He told his mom a few days after we told Gary. The next time I was there, she actually hugged me.

I stay at his house sometimes, but he never really stays here. This weekend, though, my parents are away again, and I told him he could stay. He showed up almost immediately afterwards with his things, letting himself in. I watch him now, scrolling through a list of courses at a nearby university. Even though the thought of us going to university makes me feel wildly anxious, I've been trying to help him decide what he wants to do next.

I sit upright, then shuffle around so that I can lay my head back on his lap instead. He absentmindedly puts his hand in my hair, running his fingers through it as he carries on scrolling, his face twisting. "I'll be your date to the dance, I suppose."

He puts his phone down and smiles at me. "I feel so blessed."

"You should," I say. I can see the tension in his face, though. He's stressed, and it's making it hard for him to relax. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," he sighs. "I just wish I knew what to do."

"We'll get there," I reply, giving him a reassuring smile. "I promise. I love you."

He's silent for a moment, lost in his thoughts. He doesn't always need to say it back, and I don't always need to say it back to him. We know we love each other without having to say it. I close my eyes, content to lie there in silence for a while, but then he speaks again. "Do you think we'll be together forever?"

My eyes fly back open, remembering me lying on his lap years ago, when he asked me if I thought we'd be friends forever, and the answer came so easily. The same answer comes just as easily now, too. "Yeah," I say. "As long as you want me, I'll be here."

"Even if we don't go to the same university?" He asks, frowning down at me.

"Even if you go to a different university. Even if you moved to a different country. Even if you turned into a worm."

He laughs, the tension diffusing a little. "I don't think you'd love me if I was a worm," he argues.

"I'd love you even if you were a lizard disguised as a person," I say. "Hey, do you wanna get out of here? We could go for a drive."

He probably knows I'm just trying to distract him, but he agrees anyway. We head out, and I let him decide who he wants to drive. He decides he wants to drive, so I can choose the music we listen to. I'm happy with that decision, and climb into the passenger side of his car, sinking back into the seat, happily scrolling through my playlists for the perfect one.

"Oh, did you hear about Misty?" He asks as he pulls off the drive, his headlights illuminating the front of the house. "She broke up with Ritchie."

"Really? Why?" Ritchie and Misty had barely been dating for two months. I can't say I'm surprised, though. They didn't seem a good fit for one another. "Do you think it has something to do with Gary?"