Practice (AU)

Chapter 2

TW:self harm

He walked into the party messing with his hair. He had on his leather jacket, a black band t-shirt, and some dark blue jeans. His converses were dirty with mud but he didn't care. Tonight he would get wasted and forget about the array of problems in his life. He grabbed the bottle of ciroc and began to pour his cup when he felt a hand wrap around his waist. He quickly turned his head ready to cuss out whoever was touching him but he found Miles. He was speechless for a second stammering an "Oh it's you." His breathing pattern had changed in an instant. "Ciroc is disgusting." He said retracting his hand and getting his own cup. "To each his own," Alex replied filling the cup with fruit punch. He didn't want to address the feelings he'd gotten from the touch so he downed the liquid. He chalked it up to his loneliness.

The alcohol made everything better for Alex whereas Miles only had a cup. He was planning on driving the boys home later so he needed to be sober. He still had fun, Alex was a lot more in his element. The boy was more talkative, he'd even shotgunned a beer with Jamie burping loudly afterward. Miles was interested in this side of him that he'd never seen before. As the night progressed couples began to slow dance and make out in corners. Alex stumbled to the bathroom needing to piss. "Miles can you...help me find the bathroom?" He was too drunk to navigate the mansion. "Sure." He walked him down a long corridor opening random doors to try to find it. He finally found it and Alex went in forgetting to close the door behind him. He started to unzip his pants. "Alex Jesus the door," Miles said quickly closing it. He heard the boy laughing from the other side.

He waited a few feet back from the door. When the boy was finished he pulled Miles into the bathroom. "I don't want to go back out there." He sat on the counter. "Why?" Miles asked feeling out of place. "Me head hurts...Miles, I don't get why I always feel so bad." He slurred a little. "I can drive you home?" He suggested. "No no...it's fine," Alex said putting his hand up. "Miles if I were a bird you'd be me first pick." He said drunkenly. He was undoubtedly surprised but he knew the boy wouldn't remember his conversation tomorrow. "Uh, thanks Al..." He said awkwardly. Alex stared at the boy. He was so kind, in the short time they'd known each other he'd always helped him when he needed it. He felt strong gratitude. He imagined what it would be like to...have those kinds of relations with him. The ones he tried not to think about, he's always pushed them down. But now that he was drunk the feelings were stronger than ever and it made him uneasy. All he wanted was to try it, to experience Miles fully. He wanted to feel every inch of his body against his. "Miles..." He pulled him closer. "Yes, Alex?" He asked. He'd never admit but he looked breathtaking. With his messy hair and attractive jawline. He had his legs lightly spread on the counter. He pulled Miles in between them before trying to kiss him.

Miles turned his head away so their lips wouldn't meet. He'd wished they could, Alex didn't understand how badly he wanted to kiss him. All he understood is rejection, which made fear course through him, and for a second he sobered up. He braced himself for the infinite possibilities of what could come next from those lips he'd so badly wanted to kiss. "I'm not into you like tha'." "What the hell Alex?" "You're a fuckin' homo? I knew it." These statements raced through his mind like parasitic lava. He felt tears wanting to form. "You're drunk and 'm sober it's not right," Miles said. It left Alex without closure, he wondered what would've happened if Miles had been drunk as well. "Right 'm sorry...let's forget this happened." Alex got off the counter and brushed past him. He went to the kitchen to get even more wasted, he'd just made one of his biggest mistakes yet. Even in a room full of people he still felt so alone.

"Matt, are you lads spending the night or should I drive ya home?" Miles asked the boy. He had a girl curled up beside him. "No yer good Jamie will take us in tha' mornin'." "Oh." He walked to the kitchen when Alex saw him he left. He was tempted to call out but he didn't. Instead, he poured himself straight tequila, he felt guilty about Al. The liquid burned his throat he gagged a little. He'd never get used to the taste despite it being his favorite drink at least there were no hangovers. He was probably tearing himself apart right now, wondering if Miles would tell his secret. Once the alcohol started to take effect he finally mustered up the courage to find him. He wandered the hallways opening random doors. He'd gotten three fuck off's and a couple of middle fingers. There were so many couples shagging.