Always late (skrillmau5)

Sail

We sat in the living room.
"Oh by the way, you may want to have a talk with amy"
"About?"
"Well..she's a bit...sexually charged"
"Already?!? I thought we had a good few years!"
"Nope, there's something about this fucking family, I don't get it"
She laughed
"So how's dad"
"He's alright now, he wants to talk to you though, so be ready for after school"
"Will do, he's like the only one that's not like us"
"No, I think it's about half and half, Amy's probably straight"
"Whatever you say" I mumbled
"Why do you say that"
"What? Uh no reason"
"If you know something tell me"
"No, I'm not going to tell on her!"
"Oh who am I to judge?! And I'll keep it a secret, promise, it's like I never knew"
"Well, I walked into her room the other day, she was with this girl"
"Kissing her?"
"Not exactly"
"Well, what was she doing?"
"Sucking her tit!"
"What?!?"
"It was so awkward I was just like oops"
"What the fuck"
"Well yeah, so I'm just ruling out straight for her"
"Do you think she's a lesbian?"
"Nope"
"Why?"
"Because we were talking about it, and she was saying some things"
"Oh"
I got some cereal.
"So, how's joel in bed?"
"Good" I said focusing on my cereal
"Size?"
"I don't know, it was in my ass"
"Sonny!" She said rolling her eyes
"Well, do you want the truth or not?"
"Fine. Bigger than you?"
"Not like I measured"
"And are you happy with him?"
"Very"
"Good, that's all I wanted to know"
"Cool"
"You pick them well by the way"
"Thank you"
"Like damn"
"Jealous?"
"A little"
"I should go here"
"Ok, have a nice day"
"I will" I said and walked out, this is the one fucking day I'm not late
I decided not to wait for joel by the river, I want this day to fly in, like a normal day. As if nothing in my life had ever changed.
I walked slowly through the dark, empty corridors. It's a little bit early for me to be here. I kind of felt like shit, and only one thing was echoing in my ears over and over.
The song "sail"
In a way it spoke to me.
Maybe I should cry for help. Maybe I should kill myself, I blame it on my A.D.D. Baby.
Maybe I'm a different breed. Maybe I'm not listening, so blame it on my A.D.D baby.
Why is it when Joel's not here I get these thoughts? Maybe he's dangerous. I can't get too attached to him because I have a feeling he's not forever. I'll stay away from him today.
The school began to fill up with drowsy students, not at all ready to face the day, dragging their bodies to their place of work and suffering, like any other day.
Id feel bad for them, but sadly I'm one of them.
I forced myself to go to class.
I sat at a two person table by myself, a few minutes later devon came in and sat down beside me.
"Your here early"
"Guess I am"
"Where's the boy?"
"how the hell should I know?"
"Did something happen between you two?"
"No, I just...need some time away from him"
"Oh ok"
The teacher walked in, how boring. I forgot how hard it was to function in the morning.
Before I knew it, it was lunch. I was lining up to get food
"Hey" said a voice behind me.
It was of course joel. He looked sad and confused.
"Hi" I said quietly.
"So um..how come you didn't come to the river this morning?"
"Oh...my mum woke me up early, I figured I may as well just come in"
I saw him getting kind of angry. He tensed up a bit. He went to say something but stuttered.
"Whatever!" He said and left quickly.
I sighed and sat in front of devon.
"What's the matter?"
"Nothing..relationships are just so hard!"
"Did he hurt you? I specifically told him not to! Now your heart is breaking I can see it"
"It's not! he didn't hurt me, he's just upset..for no reason but nonetheless"
"Beat the crap out of him"
"No!"
Some guy came up and pointed his pencil at me "your sonny moore, right?"
"Yeah"
"Joel Zimmerman just told me he never wants to see you again"
"What?"
"Yeah I dunno"
i stood up "where the fuck is he?"
"The bathroom"
"Thanks" I said and pushed past him.
I burst into the bathroom
"What the fuck do you mean you don't want to see me again!"
I ignored the other guy peeing, who was looking at me shocked.
"I didn't mean it, I just..."
"You just what? What did I even do?!"
"I don't know! I'm just angry at you and I don't know why!"
The kid watched us carefully through the mirror, he was in the year below us.
He turned around.
"Look, it sounds like you are having some relationship issues, but you can get over it. This a new relationship?" I nodded "well then of course things like this will happen, when I first started dating my girlfriend, there was like a full week I stopped being attracted to her! It's just a minor set back, no need to fight"
He grabbed my hand and placed it in Joels.
"See, yous look better already"
I smiled and joel smiled.
He left the bathroom "good luck" he said happily as he left.
"Sorry" he sighed
"Me too" I said and left, I forgive him, but I don't wanna be with him right now.
I went back to Devon.
"So?"
"We're ok. Still pretty pissed at him though, it's like he's on his fucking period"
He laughed
The end of the day came pretty quickly, I rushed out, I didn't really want to walk home with joel, I wanna be by myself.
I walked in my house, not smiling like I usually was.
"What's wrong sonny?" Asked my mother immediately
I just shook my head and went to my room. She came up after me
"What's up?"
"Nothing"
"Don't you want to talk about it?"
"No"
"Come on! You'll feel better"
I sighed "me and joel just had a minor set back, but we'll be alright"
"Well if you know you'll be alright then why are you still sad?"
"I don't know"
My dad stepped into the room
"Sonny. Come here" he said in a rather intimidating tone
I followed him to the kitchen table, we both sat down.
He sighed "I just don't know what to say, I never saw this coming"
I just kind of looked at him
"Say something!" He yelled
I slammed my fists on the table "what do you want me to say?!?!"
He calmed down a bit.
"Honestly sonny, are you sure you like this guy?"
"Yes!"
"And what if you have sex with him and don't like it?"
I just kind of looked at him, hoping he'd take a hint
"You already did it!"
I slowly nodded
"Fuck, sonny! Ok...ok"
He thought about it
"I don't exactly approve of this relationship but I'll accept it" he sighed "good luck to you and him"
I wanted to smile, but he still didn't approve so I'm kind of pissed. At least he's making an effort.
I stood up "aren't you happy?"
"Of course" I sighed "at least you tried to accept me" I muttered walking away
I reached for the front door "how'd it go?" Asked my mother, worried
"Fine" I said and walked out
I went to that place joel takes me. We usually go at night but I'm not sure where else to go.
I sat down. I got kind of upset thinking about this whole day.
I cried softly, trying to keep my eyes open, I don't know what sort of people come here during the day.
I heard someone behind me and quickly turned round, it was joel.
He looked at me and started to turn away.
I grabbed his hand "don't go! Please"
He sat down
He struggled a little with his words "look I'm really sorry! I don't know...why I was so mad"
"It's ok, I don't mind"
"How was your day?"
"Not very good. When I got home my dad found out I slept in with you. He didn't shout at me, I could just see he was disappointed"
He rubbed my back "it's better he found out sooner than later"
"I suppose"
He looked into my eyes for a minute
"Can I kiss you?" He asked in a daze.
i giggled "why do you need to ask?"
he shrugged and slowly leaned in.
"Ha, gaaaayy!" I heard from behind us
I turned round to some younger boy, with two friends.
"No really? A boy kissing another boy? Gay?" I asked sarcastically
He paused "ha! You like boys!"
"Yes, I do"
He didn't really know what to say at this point
"Why don't you get the dick out of your ass and-"
"No, I like it there"
"Gross"
"Your the one that said it"
Everything was really awkward, because clearly his "insults" had failed, so he gave up and left in defeat.
Joel was about to kiss me again, until his phone started ringing.
(Obviously I only heard one side of the conversation)
"Hello?"
"I'm out"
"A friend" wow thanks.
"I won't be long"
"Fine, bye"
I just kind of looked at him.
"Oh yeah I still haven't told my dad"
"Oh cool" I said kind of relieved that he was speaking to his dad.
He put his arm around me
"Come out tonight"
"Where?"
"Skateboarding with Gary and shit, at midnight"
He thought about it "ok" he agreed
"I have to go, but I'll see you tonight"
"Ok"
He kissed me on the forehead and left.
I went home
Not much happened. God I was so bored I'm glad it's 12 now. I grabbed my skateboard and left.
I text Joel the place on my way.
"Hey sonny!" Said Gary, I sat down in the circle.
"Did you not ask your boyfriend to come?"
"He'll be here soon"
"Good! I'm glad he's coming"
I looked into the roaring fire they had built in the middle of the circle. It was pretty well constructed, seems like they've had practice.
Joel came with his skateboard.
"Sit" I said making room for him. He sat down.
We all just talked for a while. It was fun
Even though it was dark, I could feel the presence of other people. Lurking.
That's when two shadowy figures walked past our private area, one of them tripped over someone in the group.
"Watch it!" She said pulling them into the light.
It was Amy!!! And some guy!!!
i gasped "AMY!"
She looked at me shocked "sonny!"
"Amy you promised me you wouldn't!!"
She looked at the boy guilty "I know... I'm sorry"
"No!" I got really angry "girls, whatever fine. But boys? No!"
"Ok sonny" she nodded sadly.
I looked at the boy and stood up "and you! Stay away from her, do you hear me?!"
"Or what?" He said nastily
I grabbed his wrist and twisted it "you really wanna find out?" I hissed through my teeth
"Your hurting me" he cried
"That's the idea. Now get lost" I said throwing him to the side.
"Go home Amy"
"But-
"Now!"
"Ok" she said and walked away.
I sat down and sighed.
They were all silent in shock
"Who was that?" Asked Gary
"My sister"
"Ohhh" they all said at once.
We all went skateboarding, I got home at half two.
I went in to get some vodka after a long night, Amy was sitting at the kitchen table "sit" she said immediately.
I grabbed the bottle and sat down
"Yeah?"
"I really am sorry sonny"
I drank some "k" I said quietly
"I guess I can stay with girls, but it's kind of boring"
"So try something new with her? I don't know" I said, now drinking the vodka in huge gulps.
She grabbed the bottle off me "will you slow down"
"Why?" I looked at her weirdly
"Oh yeah, mum and dad are going out for dinner tomorrow night, they said your in charge of me, so I'm bringing a girl round, ok?"
"Sure, whatever. I'm going to bed"
"Night sonny"
"Night"
I woke up the next morning, good, I'm late once again.
I sat on the grass beside the river and saw Joel approaching.
He kissed me softly. Then sat down beside me
"Come round tonight, my parents aren't going to be home"
He smiled "ok"
We went in at lunch and got food. The day was so boring, well it's school, what did I expect. Before I knew it, I was swinging open my front door, as happy as ever.
"Good to see you happy" smiled my mother
"Thanks"
I just stayed in my room until they left, then I called Joel.
We decided to just watch Netflix for a while, I lay on top of him and he put his arms around me.
Amy came in, holding hands with this girl.
"We'll be upstairs"
"Ok" I nodded
We were watching a few episodes of Dexter, I love that show. I relate so much with Dexter, he knows. He's a smart guy.
Amy came back downstairs with her girl.
The girl smiled at me and Joel
"Hi"
"Hi, what's your name again?" I asked trying to be polite
"Nina"
"Nice to meet you nina"
Amy just kind of looked at me "ok time for Nina to go"
She opened the door and let her out
"Don't get friendly with my girls!"
"Why the fuck not?"
"She doesn't mean that much to me so...I don't want you to get to know her"
"Ok...whatever"
"So..I guess I'll just leave then" she said slowly
"You can stay if you want"
"Yay, that's good because I have literally nothing to do"
We watch another episode of Dexter
"I don't want to watch Dexter anymore" I flung myself over the coffee table "what do you guys wanna do?"
"I don't know" shrugged Amy
"Oh! First person to find something I can embarrass mum with gets a prize"
"Ok" they both nodded intrigued
"Wait"
I went into the kitchen and got whipped cream.
I started to draw with it, I drew a map of the house on the coffee table.
I messed it up sooo badly
"What is that even supposed to be?" Asked Amy
"It's the house"
"Your a disappointment"
I sprayed her with whipped cream
"Hey!"
We all looked around for ages, it was fun because the whole time everybody was like cracking jokes and it was great. We met in the hallway
"Nothing"
"Same"
"Same, fuck I need my revenge...fuck it"
I handed Amy my phone
"Order some food"
"Ok" she said and went downstairs
"Oh yeah um..." Said Joel shyly, he almost looked embarrassed
"What is on the blank disk"
"Oh, gay porn"
"Could I maybe...borrow it sometime?"
"Keep it, I don't need it anymore, I don't need to hide my browsing history, you know?"
"Yeah, cool. Thanks"
"Remind me to give it to you"
He winked
"You know what I meant" we both snickered
We went back downstairs
"What'd you order?"
"Pizza"
"Good call"
We sat there for a minute
Joels POV
Sonny seemed kind of upset
"I'll be back in a minute" he said and ran upstairs
Me and Amy just kind of looked at eachother
"Do you think he's alright?"
"I don't know, go see" she said, pretty chill
"Should I?"
"Yeah, go"
I went up the stairs and knocked on the bathroom door
"Yeah?" He said innocently
"Are you ok?"
"Yeah...I'm fine" I could hear that he was crying but he was trying to cover it up
"Can..I come in?"
"No"
"Why not?"
"I just...um..I don't want you to judge me"
"I'm not going to judge you"
He slowly opened the door and looked at me with his wide eyes, tears running down his face.
I put my arms around him.
"What's wrong baby" I said in a sympathetic whisper.
"I've just been over thinking a bit" he sniffed
I bunched up his soft hair in my hands and pulled his head in close to my chest. I gently rocked him, like a parent would with their child.
The pizza came and we went down to eat it.
"Are you ok sonny?" Asked Amy
"Yeah, I'm alright"
We stayed up until 1 just talking, and then Amy went to bed.
Sonny took my hand and guided me upstairs
He open the door and started to kiss me. He started slow but built up the speed.
He put his hands behind my neck and got more into it.
I panicked a little and stopped kissing him.
"What if your parents come home"
"They wont" he said and began kissing me again
"But what if they do?"
"So? They know we're sleeping together, what's the big deal?"
"Nothing, just-"
He put his lips on mine to shut me up.
-next morning-
I slowly opened my eyes to find a woman towering over our lifeless bodies.
She smiled "morning Joel, could you wake up sonny for me please?"
"Yeah" I replied sleepily and watched her leave the room and close the door behind her.
I looked down, sonny was lying on top of me and I had my arms tightly wrapped around him.
I shook him a bit "sonny....sonny!"
He opened his eyes "what?"
"Your mum told me to wake you up"
He sighed and gently closed his eyes again, I could feel him drifting back to sleep.
I shook him again. He gasped and grabbed onto my arm.
"Fine, I'm getting up"
He got up and started getting dressed.
He looked at me "you know...you have to get up too"
"I will, two seconds" I answered, fading back out of reality
"Get up lazy shit"
I rolled out of bed and got changed.
Sonny sat on his bed texting
"I don't want to go to school" I whined
"Wait" he said unfocused
He looked up ten minutes later
"Sorry, what were you saying?"
"Never mind"
His face slowly dropped "oh ok"
"I just said I didn't want to go to school"
He smiled again "oh yeah, me neither"
He handed me the blank disk and winked, then ran to the door "you coming?"
"Yeah" I said putting it in my bag.
I took his hand I hopped downstairs with him.