A Thousand Years in Perfect Symmetry

five hundred behind

When Alhaitham woke up in the morning, he didn't move. The sun streamed in, as usual, and the sound of insects and birds chirping echoed outside. He didn't dare move.

It felt all too cruel to still be stuck despite everything. If he'd really offended the Akademiya so badly, why couldn't they have at least done him the favor of ensuring he forgot like everyone else? It seemed altogether too painful to continue to remember when everyone else had the privilege to forget.

His eyes wandered to the drawer he'd placed the Divine Knowledge Capsule in— It must've been weeks ago by now. He didn't know enough about it and there was only other one option if it wasn't the Akademiya, so it was either them or that thing forcing him through this torment. There was no way around it and he wasn't sure which he despised more.

It didn't matter anyway.

He tried to look on the bright side, tried to tell himself that if Kaveh forgot everything, he'd just get an ever sweeter confession when this was done. As cruel as it was to be denied, the loop ensured that only he could grow.

He couldn't truly fault Kaveh for not being able to remember. Kaveh was a person who was always learning, always building things up from scratch, and, despite still not taking jobs for the monetary stability they may have provided, this did mean he always ensured he gained from the experience.

Alhaitham had to cling to the idea that, if he were given the chance, whatever conflicting feelings Kaveh might have had for him would grow. The Akademiya had placed everyone in a vacuum, and perhaps it had been irrational for Alhaitham to think Kaveh could accept everything in a day like he wanted.

He yearned for the day's end even more.

Time passed differently. If he slept, surely the end of this wretched day would come again and again until it truly stopped. He didn't truly need anything here, after all, if he stayed in bed, unmoving and unthinking, for the rest of this god-forbidden festival hellscape, who were the Akademiya to stop him?

It just needed to end and, if by pretending it all didn't exist he somehow got there faster, so be it.

Alhaitham must've stayed like that for a long time, wrapped between the covers and drifting in and out of consciousness. Just waiting for the beep.

Then there was a knock at the door.

That'd never happened before, so he was immediately sure it was because he hadn't left. He didn't answer, but Kaveh pushed the door open slowly anyway.

"Haitham is something—" He paused upon seeing him. Alhaitham wasn't looking at him, utterly refused to watch, but he could hear him stop in the doorway. Frozen perhaps. "Are you okay?"

"Go back to your drawings," Alhaitham muttered in response. He lifted a hand from the blankets to wave him off. "I'm sure you're still busy."

He couldn't hear him move nor did the door shut, so Alhaitham was certain he was still standing there, watching him. Then Kaveh sighed and asked that question he'd been beginning to hate, "Did something happen in Port Ormos?"

"No," He spat it out like a curse. "Why are you here? We both know you can't even take care of yourself, let alone both of us, so I don't see why you're checking up on me."

It was cruel, he knew it was, but he didn't want to consider still bothering to waste pretty words and apologies when Kaveh was incapable of remembering the way he had learned from it the next day.

Alhaitham shut his eyes tight, taking in a quick breath. The real next day... Kaveh had left his door open after they'd returned from the festival. He'd disregarded it but now it stuck out like a sore thumb. The silent option for him to join him. He wished he could still take it.